First of all dudes, please don't say, " Hey I'm stoked when anybody can make a living from surfing."

Ok, Good Lordy, how many young upstarts has the surfing world seen, heralded since grommethood, as the "Next Big Thing." All of these dudes, really fall short of expectations. I understand Australians, like Shane Herring, get too drunk and screw things up. But so many dudes just get hyped by the media and fall flat. Then they go on trips and get photos taken of them, and basically cruise for ten years. Ballsack to that. If you are pro you should be on the tour. I hate pro surfing but this, "I am a pro surfer-dude who travels around with photographers like Seth Stafford following me around" is Bullhonkey. Get a real job, or better yet go back to San Clemente and sell weed or something.

Is everybody a videographer, a photographer and/or a blogger today? Stop please...just stop.

Kelly Slater is not a real person. You been sold lies and fell for them. Quicksilver saw the largely untapped East Coast market and created this Kelly Slater person. He is just a media ploy. I mean really........50 world titles????? Some dude from Cocoa Beach acting like a scholar, a Juliard Musician, a golf pro, etc ????? C'mon wake up white people(Daniel Carver)........You got taken by Quicksilver....That friggin bald head of his because HIS HOLYNESS can't be seen with the flaw of male pattern baldness. PLEASE !!! There is no Kelly Slater.

Hey do any of you guys shop at Target because of Kolohe? Just curious. I can imagine some of you skipping down the isles with your moms screaming, " Mommy, Mommy......what brand of toothpaste does Kolohe use???"