Homophobia is lame. Seriously. Its the 21st Century, its time to evolve.
Also lame: Boards made in China. The skull n crossbones era of surf clothes in the late 90's and the hardcore overly serious attitude that followed. How seriously should you be taken if your sport involves wearing booties?
Also lame are miatas w rainbow stickers and white wetsuits. And political correctness
I ain't been this star struck since I mistook Dane Reynolds and his girl for a couple of tourists from PB!
Welcome to SwellInfo Roy. We’re not like the other people, here on the internets, we’re your friends.
Originally Posted by Roy Stuart
You have a strange definition of lame then.
I have a 13 foot board, the Future Primitive 'Ghost' 13 which has been on tour since 2008 and has just arrived in San Francisco from Hawaii, she's a great board and is available to be ridden. Ken 'Skindog' Colins is goinf to have a go in the near future.
“You have a strange definition of lame then.” No arguments there. This thread is actually a joke thread. Sadly, the sarcastic nature of the humor has been lost on a few of the people who’ve responded. A lot of good stuff, with practical applications, a great deal of which I’ve purchased myself, made it on here:
Originally Posted by zaGaffer
oh sh!1!, I'm outta here. only time I've ever deuced in the line-up : )
Fins. Damn YOU BOB SIMMONS
The foam surfboard blank. Surfboards should still all be made of wood and weigh 90lbs.
Wetsuits. Kook Shirts
It’s all very tongue in cheek. Despite rumors to the contrary, not all American comedy (just the really good stuff) consists of d!ck and fart jokes. We also have what’s colloquially known as “bathroom humor”. The pie gag was invented here.
Some people could find humor in the image of a grown man, with an outlandishly large beard and mane of hair, dressed in a bright orange wet-suit, wearing a white motorcycling helmet, apparently squatting on a giant board in relatively small surf. I am one of those people.
As it strays from the norms of conventional surfing, the imagery, which taken out of context from the rest of the ride, begs for the comedian. That was all my post was meant to be. A little good natured ribbing and some internet humor amongst friends who frequent a small corner of the surfwebs. Sadly, I don’t get paid to make jokes, so it’s not my strong point, please take it as flattery. After all, you’re an internet celebrity and a world famous surfboard shaper. Once in the public eye, one should expect some satire. Personally, I admire the fact that you march to the beat of your own drum.
Your prices are in the astronomical range in the context of the main-stream surfing world, but when compared to what’s hanging in the Tate, the price is probably spot-on. I assume that your clientele care a great deal more about the latter than the former. However, being the average, run-of-the-mill surfer, it’s quite easy to poke fun at the half-million dollar surfboard crowd. It’s the same thing as poking fun at a Fisker Karma. They’re both fine products, just not for a hoi-polloi, Good Ol’ Boy like me.
Personally, I’m all for giant, wooden surfboards. Greg Noll is a surfer and shaper who has influenced me more than anyone else except for the family members who taught me. I can’t think of anyone who has contributed more to the rebirth of the olo and elevating surfboard design and crafting to a high art than Greg Noll. I’ve been watching my father in law restore a vintage Noll board over the last few weeks, a truly fascinating process, much more difficult and time consuming than shaping and glassing a board from scratch. There’s no denying that your boards are works of art and examples of extremely fine craftsmanship. I look forward to the Future Primitive Ghost 13’9” or the infamous Pipeline Challenge Board, as it is more widely known (and more quickly described), making its way to San Diego. Looks like just my kind of ride. Perhaps I will get a chance to find its sweet spot. Having surfed purely by chance with one of its earlier reviewers, at his home break, I’d like to take a crack at it. Being 20 odd years his junior, I think I could give it a go. Prolly not nearly as well as it’s more well known rider, the gentlemen currently surfing Nazaré. Perhaps it will be here on April 25th and I’ll have another excuse to raise a pint (or 3) on that day.
Last edited by zaGaffer; Jan 28, 2013 at 08:37 PM.
It's all good Gaffer and thanks for your thoughts.
I looked at the list of lame surf products posted here and agreed that they were all pretty poor except for the zinc block, in any case I am aware of the humour but don't let that stand in the way of a retort.
One assumes that you are referring to Garrett, he seems like a good hearted person but unfortunately he rode the board from way too far back, which some beginners do. I explained to him that he should ride from further forward and he replied that he'd be sure to stand further back next time. Lost in translation perhaps, or did he listen to Randy the Snake instead of Roy?
Turbo tunnels have several design flaws, we prefer half pipe tunnels which are not constricted at the exit.