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Thread: Kids say the darndest things
Jul 18, 2014, 04:33 AM #31
Jul 18, 2014, 05:21 AM #32
Hey, just out of curiosity are you on public assistance? I mean 9.5 of you in a big van. That's a lot beans and diapers. Do you get money from the state every month? Do you get like 3,600$ for each kid from the Feds at the end of the year, do you even pay taxes? I'd move to Alaska and have 10 kids, they give you like $1800 a head, 'cept I get cold and I don't have wetsuit thicker than 3/2. Do you get section 8 housing? How bout free Medicare? You get state grants for that surf school? I mean, you don't exactly have time for a 9 to 5 between your ministry and the surf school for disadvantaged youth, right? Government gotta take care of folks.
My mama always said I'd make a fine preacher or congressman, usually after catchin me with my father's small collection of Larry Flynt publications he kept out in the garage. One of her favorite phrases, it's always inspired me. I'm not exactly qualified for government employment, however I've always I felt I had a calling to serve The Lord. I have a great memory and a head for biblical verse and can twist a phrase, plus I have it on good authority, I look devilishly handsome in a well tailored suit.
How much do you clear every year, I'm talkin net?
There was a man in the land of Uz. . . blameless and upright, and one who feared God and shunned evil. And seven sons and three daughters were born to him.
Jul 18, 2014, 10:33 AM #33
Jul 18, 2014, 11:43 AM #34
Maybe it'll help with your decision making process.
I like to have a cold one in the afternoons, read this **** while laughing my ass off and congratulating myself for having had the good sense not to have bred.
Jul 18, 2014, 12:12 PM #35
Jul 18, 2014, 12:25 PM #36
This thread started out really nicely then Wayne came along and got everyone worked up.
Another small feel-good story. My son is 17 months and learning new words everyday. It's generally hysterical. The waves were decent Wednesday night so I went out for a while. When I came back I asked him if he could say "surf". His lightning-fast response was "shurf".
Jul 19, 2014, 12:36 AM #37
Why don't you take a seat over there
Last edited by ATANTICOO; Jul 19, 2014 at 12:38 AM.
Jul 19, 2014, 02:52 AM #38