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  1. #41
    Join Date
    Oct 2012
    Location
    UGHHH! :(
    Posts
    314
    Quote Originally Posted by banman View Post
    Guys my wiener is still stuck in my board, what can I use to get it out without dissolving my *****?
    Sex wax of course.

  2. #42
    Quote Originally Posted by banman View Post
    Guys my wiener is still stuck in my board, what can I use to get it out without dissolving my *****?
    blowtorch and some tweezers, son.


  3. #43
    Join Date
    Nov 2011
    Location
    New England
    Posts
    28
    Just wax the bottom of your feet.

  4. #44
    Join Date
    Jul 2007
    Location
    Promontorium Tremendum
    Posts
    906
    Images
    1
    Quote Originally Posted by KookieMonster View Post
    I have a method of putting wax on a surfboard and before I make a youtube video I'd like to run it by you guys to see if you can add some tips.



    1.) KNOW THE WATER TEMPERATURE - surfing is all about knowing things. you couldn't ride a surfboard if you didnt know what one was right?

    I'll usually carry a pocket thermometer and wade at least waist deep (this is trouble in the wintertime so definitely buy a pair of rubber fishing waders). Hold the thermometer in for at least 20 seconds to make sure that you capture the thermal energy correctly.

    2.) ASK A LOCAL - got to the most local shop around and tell them about your temperature readings and the depth you measured them at. Ask them if there are any known currents in the area that you chose that might cause any temperature fluctuations. If everythings checks out...

    3.) BUY SOME WAX - smell every bar and choose the one in your price and temperature range. If one smells really nice then it is probably the one for you. But some waxes might smell nice and be out of your price range. Buy a wax that is both affordable and one that has an oder that is pretty good.

    4.) TIME TO WAX - the most highly debated things in the surfboard industry are related to wax. I'm going to make it simple

    The horizontal method - for this tecnique your going to want to apply the wax across the woodden thing in the middle of the board. This is good for turns.

    The vetical method -this tecnique is more for surfers with long arms. You apply the wax up and down the board. This is also a good tecnique if you like going straight.

    The cross pattern - this is a hybrid tecnique of the two previous. More for performance than grip really.

    Swirl Tecnique - great for anything from knee high barrels to 23 foot barrels. Also good for people who like circles and other round things.

    Remember whatever tecnique you choose is going to determine how other people see you applying the wax.


    5.) POST SURF DE-STRIPPING - Once your done its time to strip the wax off. I use a combination of nail polish remover and varnish and let it soak over night. Use a blowdryer the next morning to get any remaining clumps or residue.



    Anyways this is my first tutorial, what do you guys think?
    i think you're over-thinking it.

    Remember whatever tecnique you choose is going to determine how other people see you applying the wax.
    huh?

  5. #45
    Join Date
    Aug 2012
    Location
    Turtle Island
    Posts
    4,074
    Images
    6
    Quote Originally Posted by hanna View Post
    i think you're over-thinking it.
    I'd say so too, I thought maybe this was a joke at first.

  6. #46
    Quote Originally Posted by Zippy View Post
    I like to lay my board on the pavement in front of the front tire of my truck, strategicaly place several whole chunks of wax, then drive over it a few times. It really smooshes in the wax and leaves tire patterns for better grip while doing air reverses.
    LMAO. +1 for Zippy.

  7. #47
    Quote Originally Posted by seldom seen View Post
    I thought maybe this was a joke at first.
    I thought so too, but when he mentioned his techniques were good for riding 23 foot barrels, I realized this kid knew what he was talking about.

    That's why I've since switched to his swirly technique. I think my waxing procedure might have been holding me back.

  8. #48
    I draw ****s. When the board is fully waxed, it's just ****s on ****s on ****s.

    Also, I wax the bottom, fins, and leash. You know, more ****s.

  9. #49
    Join Date
    Oct 2012
    Location
    grass lake, mi
    Posts
    43
    Images
    11
    Oh snap! Every time I need to laugh I can count on this forum. You guys are hilarious. Keep it up. Wax on wax off! LOL Hey when are they gona make wax that doesn't rub my nipples raw?

  10. #50
    Join Date
    Aug 2012
    Location
    Turtle Island
    Posts
    4,074
    Images
    6
    Just let them rub off dude, life is sooo much easier without them.