This winter has sucked for me. Now finally a weekend where the surf and weather lines up and I'm NOT on call. Plans made to bail Fri PM and stay with friends in Wilmywood Fri night or ride down early Sat and hit CB.
Then I come in to work today and at 10AM I'm told I have to come in tomorrow...for one freaking thing that will take literally 10 mins. No way to do it remotely either.
I wish I knew what gods I have offended and what sacrifices I need to make to rectify my transgressions.
Help me out peeps. What do I need to do to remove the curse? Drown an aggro fueled kook? Attack a bull shark with my bare hands and wearing nothing but a Fitzpedo? Beat a latex dummy senseless? Just tell me my penance and I'll do it.
!@#*(&^!@()!@#$#)(&!#$)(&!@#%))!)**!!!!! (Will this get me another infarction for potty mouth?)
You must renounce Belmar, NJ as the epicenter of East Coast surf culture and pronounce Cocoa Beach as the summit of all things surf on the East Coast and beyond. That and donate a quad fish (just for a few weeks to try out) to the sisurfdoggHealTheOceanFoundation. It will be returned it fairly good shape.
Easy solution. Get rip roaring drunk tonight. I mean like Irish-wake, stupid, trow-up-in-the-street drunk. Make sure no co-workers know of this binge. Show up for work tomorrow WITHOUT showering or brushing your teeth. You will be sent home. The surf beckons. It will cure your hangover too!
I'm noting all these suggestions, please keep them coming. Also thinking of jumping in the lake on the way in and walk in dripping wet in a wetsuit and ask them if they really want me messing around with power in a data center. Then strip down to the fitzpedo and do some stretching exercises in front of the security cameras.
Ditto, hang tough T, spring swells just 'round the corner & all for you, senor.
Maybe call in a Norovirus Alert to your employer this afternoon, as in 'the entire place of employment has been hit by a Norovirus.' Avoids the imposition of a federal prison term, which is what you'd get in our clampdown society these days for the time-tested high school spring day bomb threat.
One other thing you might consider...? Pounding a latex dummy into submission might git you some good karma. It seems to work for chubbsy wubbsy up there in the woods.