Surf Product Inventions

Always gotta have a filter on a proper spliff

 

retractable leashes like the ones for dogs

 

True story. Such an advantage in all aspects of performance.

 

Always thought it would be cool to have some kind of blow up bouy type thing with a retractable cord on the bottom and a small weight that could be put outside the lineup. that had speakers you could connect to an mp3. like good speakers that are loud as ****! Maybe everyone in the lineup wouldn't like my choice of music. But it would still be pretty sick to have. Probably wouldn't work well on big days lol. but the average waist to chest high days would be pretty cool

 

My buddies tied an anchor to a body board. Then on-top of said sponge, they attached a milk crate. Inside the milk crate was a cooler. Inside the cooler were a handful of adult beverages. They anchored the contraption outside the lineup, and wham, floating dehydration station.

 

Bruddah, I think we got the same bruddahs!

 

Thor rocks!!!! Funny funny stuff.

How about remote controlled battery powered shark fins that you could deploy to clear out the lineup before a mid am paddle out at you favorite peak? No more need for dawn patrol for those solitaire sessions. Or a sharknado generator? That would be cool, no? Us southerners could unleash some fury on New Joisey lineups. With our abundance of sharks down here, we could import them up north for free. Then snake their biotches. Oh, I forgot, the Jerzey Goilz already are down here trolling for Florida surfers with real tans that can shred 23 footers or tight hollow tubes all the same.

 

I have a beer belt that holds a six pack it could probably be modified so they wont fall out when paddling out. I think I am going to rig it up to be able to do that.

 

Reading my mind. Is it disorderly conduct or disturbing the peace if you pose any type of fake shark threat?

 

Bingo! Sign me up for 6. That'd be good for hours of laughs

 

I've always thought some sort of goop to rub on your board to reduce foot slippage would be SICK. I have this problem with my back foot slipping off the tail forcing me into a split mid-shred. I usually just ride it out.

 

What about a surfboard with a built in motor? You could just jet around the line up and you wouldn't even have to paddle for waves.

 

A floating porter John. Nobody likes riding a log

 

A string of 25 inflatable lineup dummies with sinkers.Just throw them out in the water first thing in the morning and it looks like your lineup is to packed so know one will paddle out near you. Sort of like those dummies you stick in the car .

 

There is this really cool invention. It's called surf wax. Just sayin!

 

Here's to you, Real Man of Genius.

Purely awesome.

 

You ok brah? You best check your fuse box to see if the one marked "sarcasm" need replacement!

 

Would love a longer board that I could perhaps stand on and use an oar or some sort to paddle into waves... show all them regular surfers how cool I am when I can paddle from the deep into all the waves....

Sarcasm aside....

Camel bladder built into the wetsuit to hold coffee for cold DPs and provide warmth for the initial cold rush; but insulated so not to burn your back while on.

Wrist mounted air-horn that can be initiated anytime someone is about to drop in on you and the simple: "Got wave" or mindless grunt does not work.

Shrink ray... small days just be able to shrink yourself down to the waves size... epic 23 footers all the time on ankle high days

 

Just going thru the initial throes of a flat spell bro. Thanks for lookin out. Fuse boxed checked.

 

Roger that, mate. I've been in and out of several odd stages of swell withdrawal myself. Got a couple takeoffs tonight in 10 inches of mush and told my brah that it must be like what smokers feel after getting a couple puffs on a cig during a short work break. Good for another four hours til I get the shakes again. Let's see if the females can be a solid anaesthetic tonight.

In other news...the Feds are currently outside of BCN's parents' house as he's cyberstalking at least eight different unsuspecting targets.