SI Swell Drive: Donate to Invest 98L

Discussion in 'All Discussions' started by EmassSpicoli, Oct 9, 2013.

  1. EmassSpicoli

    EmassSpicoli Well-Known Member

    Apr 16, 2013
    It appears that our latest hope for cane swell is getting a bit dizzy and disoriented much like it's most recent predecessor. In the effort to salvage what may be one of the last chances at big time scoring during this futile cane season, we've organized the SI Swell Drive to woo the tropical wave our way.

    Pledge your donation today to build up the dowry we offer this Invest! Can be anything of value to you, something that's been in the family for years, or even days. See what some SI forumites have already pledged:

    Steve83: webbed gloves
    KookieMonster: a dozen extra-gluten double chocolate chip cookies
    zaGaffer: Radioactive Man #1 comic book
    brewengineer: 6 pints of stiff homemade grog
    MVsurfer: a swatch of neoprene from his 7mm wetty
    PB&J: an empty 375ml bottle of Kasser's vodka
    Swellinfo admin: two Get Out of SI Ban Free cards
    Roy Stuart: a red Kevlar wetty with hydrophobic suede seams and sequined white racing stripes
    rcarter: 8 bottles of thorazine and lithium he refuses to take
    sandblasters: a modified AR15 with 6.5 mm Grendel caliber
    waterbaby: rcarter's rusty shank
    sonfollowerssurf: 99 Novenas
    chicharronne: a bucket of fried chicken hunted with SB's modded AR15
    Charles Taylor: a 24-hour chip from Alcoholics Anonymous (stolen, not earned)
    DawnPatrolSUP: a bottle of super-hold Aqua Net hairspray and signed 8x10 from Chuck Liddell
    Erock: a DeWalt router, his 1st Coil board, & NWA's Straight Outta Compton 12" vinyl
    Gruvi: a copy of his first visa for entry to the USA and his first pinning award
    NJshredmachine: 256GB iPhone 6 and a limited-edition German-engineered cold air intake
    jerseyplayerforever: 10 large deposited in a Swiss bank account and his latest progress work
    Bill Cosby's Nephew: nothing, since everything he has is owned by his parents
    archy: full assortment of Spy Tech equipment and 6,194 liters of methylated GMOs
    sisurfdogg: an eighth of dank ass Northern Lights
    goosemagoo: a half-used carton of epsom salt and 14 potassium pills
    BassMon: remnants of TS Andrea
    Koki Barrells: a Naval Jack sponge signed by Danny McBride
    fins369: promise to return to SI and post regularly
    seldom seen: the husky pup in his avatar
    pinkstink: credit for $19.69 to Cuffy's of Cape Cod
    ClemsonSurf: a seat at the head of the table for his Thanksgiving meal next month
    mitchell: a vacuum-sealed container of the rarest species of bed bugs from El Tunco
    cepriano: an old school barometric chart and GPS coordinates to his most sacred secret spot
    LBCrew: the priceless all-inclusive memoirs of his legendary surf life
    AO/OO: a custom-shaped bonzed out woodie HPLB with beer holders and pyrotechnic launchers

    I'm pledging 2 sticks from my absurdly over-abundant quiver, a 6 lesson package for Learn-to-Surf in 8-10' Windy Chop, and never to let my average daily post tally on SI reach double digits.

    Braddahs, this is not the time to be stingy. Post your personal offering here and watch Invest 98L move westward! Come bearing gifts for the tropical wave and give rise to Hurricane Lorenzo!

    FREE TS LORENZO
     
  2. goosemagoo

    goosemagoo Well-Known Member

    900
    May 20, 2011
    I actually have a 1/2 used carton of epsom salts. How about 2lbs of half rotten bananas instead of the potassium. It'll keep the water extra salty so we can float in our 7mil suits.
     

  3. Koki Barrels

    Koki Barrels Well-Known Member

    Aug 14, 2008
    thumbs up, got to give it to you, EMass...you are very creative.
     
  4. fl.surfdog

    fl.surfdog Well-Known Member

    Dec 6, 2010
    Nice job Emass, very entertaining, I'm still laughing
     
  5. DawnPatrol321

    DawnPatrol321 Well-Known Member

    Mar 6, 2012
    Bravo sir, Bravo... although I don't really have enough hair on top of my head to use any hair spray, I keep it buzzed pretty low, but funny nonetheless
     
  6. njsurfer42

    njsurfer42 Well-Known Member

    Nov 9, 2009
    i'm not sure if i should be pleased or insulted by my exclusion...
     
  7. 252surfer

    252surfer Well-Known Member

    Dec 1, 2010
    ill donate my soul for overhead, offshore hurricane barrels
     
  8. Sandblasters

    Sandblasters Well-Known Member

    May 4, 2013
    i second the motion, even though today was pretty good.
     
  9. 252surfer

    252surfer Well-Known Member

    Dec 1, 2010
    its been blown the **** out here in VB. if i wasnt going to blacksburg this weekend id be going down to hatteras. gonna get my fix early tomorrow here while the wind goes down.
     
  10. Mad Atom

    Mad Atom Well-Known Member

    615
    Jul 16, 2013
    Can't believe I got stiffed on this. I have so much to offer, but since you didn't include me I'm keeping it all for myself. Screw you guys, I'm going home.
     
  11. EmassSpicoli

    EmassSpicoli Well-Known Member

    Apr 16, 2013
    Brahs, those were the first offerings to be reported. Everyone else is encouraged to list their donation!!! The greater the bounty of offering the more Lorenzo will swim his Hispanic ass this way!!!! Give to the needy and not the greedy!!!!
     
  12. DawnPatrol321

    DawnPatrol321 Well-Known Member

    Mar 6, 2012
    I'll donate all of my 80's porn mags, my first 6'4" BAT surfboard, and my jockstrap from high school football
     
  13. leethestud

    leethestud Well-Known Member

    Aug 12, 2010
    I'll donate a few mL of high grade semen.
     
  14. EmassSpicoli

    EmassSpicoli Well-Known Member

    Apr 16, 2013
    You better hope there were no cams at the sperm bank you broke into. Because the rare occasion you don't shoot blanks, it's a half-aqueous solution of inevitable gene deletion. Sadly and disgustingly, your wahines sent pics to prove it.

    But shoots brah, good donation to the cause!! Quality load of kids or two is good for a few more seconds on the period of Lorenzo's swell!!!
     
  15. seldom seen

    seldom seen Well-Known Member

    Aug 21, 2012
    Whoa!! I'd sacrifice myself before my ace Phinny...that's my boy and I'd die for him. So I'll collect some neighborhood children to sacrifice in his stead.
     
  16. wavehog1

    wavehog1 Well-Known Member

    382
    Sep 20, 2013
    I'm donating aerosol cans by the thousands so that we can get this climate change kicked in high gear! What happened to these massive storms brought on by climate change we're supposed to be having?! Cmon sea....RISE!!!
     
  17. EmassSpicoli

    EmassSpicoli Well-Known Member

    Apr 16, 2013
    Good looks on the joxygen. L-dogg needs plenty for his Trans-Atlantic trek. Also, throw in a few late 70s back issues as he prefers the full "vegetation". He'll be please to be rollin in his six fo.
     
  18. wavehog1

    wavehog1 Well-Known Member

    382
    Sep 20, 2013
    Aaaahhh porn mags! Bout as relevant as a phone booth! Though in an apocalypse or doomsday situation they may come in very handy! (no pun intended)
     
  19. DawnPatrol321

    DawnPatrol321 Well-Known Member

    Mar 6, 2012
    HAHA, why get rid of things you need? I'm trying to "unload" some of my belongings that don't get any use anymore, so figured this is the best way, plus 80's porn mags are just classic, you can't get stuff like that anymore, there's gotta be some sentimental value that Invest 98L can use to gain strength from.
     
  20. wavehog1

    wavehog1 Well-Known Member

    382
    Sep 20, 2013
    Sentimental value? Like a bunch of ol girlfriends right?!

    I had a ton of them myself and one cold winter night we had a huge bonfire, drank a few beers, sat around the fire and read old porn mags. Then into the fire the ladies went! It was a sad night..... said goodbye to a lot of old mamarries and relationships.