The Seldom Seen Christmas Special

Overhead last night down here...should be super fun up there this morning with a little offshore wind.

 

But it's never offshore in FL Surfdog, you know that! HAHA

 

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World B what's up homie!?

My Pa's a big Imus fan and always sings that tune...also the one that goes 'I don't care if it rains or freezes as long as I got my plastic Jesus riding on the dashboard of my car'.

 

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This is a 'Yay'
You MUST finish. Even that hack Steven King finished the Dark Tower series. I waited half my life for him to finish that story. I still didn't get the ending.

 

Yay. One Of the only reasons I still lurk is for some SJB PJB Third Rock Star infused belles lettres. I used the thesaurus for that gem.
Chavez YChavez. The story loops back to the beginning. now that he picks up his friend's abandoned battle horn he might be able to complete the quest... Whatever the f*ck it is... I don't remember anymore. I started reading that series when I was in College and finished 2 years after my son graduated from college...

 

I spent my morning challenging the theory of what a ridable wave is. The lifeguards and touristas were quite perplexed as I walked across the beach with a longboard, wondering what I was going to do with that thing, but I will be damned if I didn't snag 10-12 little ankle to knee slappers. Nice morning, better than not surfing, but still, 4 days of surfing in one week. That is unheard of around here. Sunday and Monday were as good as a June day could be 'round these parts. Hopefully this is the start to a special summer.

 

Yay.......

 

Marty Indeera Sandusky had just returned to New Jersey from a South Pacific island where he resided for seven years. Living for so long on a island - dodging cannibals and Liam McNamara - while hiding amongst chicken coops and vegetables gardens had taken its toll on Marty Indeera Sandusky's mind. He began to lose his marbles like some black guy in the hole on MSNBC's Lock-up Raw. However, Marty Indeera Sandusky had yet resorted to smearing his body and room with feces, and refrained from throwing cups of urine at authority figures. Therefore, Marty Indeera Sandusky was well-respected by state correction officers, which would later prove ironic.

So, upon return to his native New Jersey, Marty Indeera Sandusky turned a bit odd. Inspired by the recent fad of comic book movies, Marty Indeera Sandusky decided to become his own superhero based on his delusions of grandeur of forming the perfect government-free utopian society.........in New Jersey of all places.

Marty Indeera Sandusky transformed himself into MR. ANARCHY - hero of all who hate taxes and trash removal. At first it started as a weekend cosplay fixation, where Mr. Anarchy dazzled impressionable, 45-year-old dorks whose lives revolve around 5th grade, Dungeon and Dragon fantasies. However, something snapped in Marty Indeera Sandusky's mind, and Mr. Anarchy soon took over Marty Indeera Sandusky.

Marty Indeera Sandusky was dead. Mr. Anarchy was now born and baptized.

Within two months of returning home, Mr. Anarchy, constantly donned a Superman-like outfit, with the "ANARCHY" symbol in place of the SM logo. His tights made the local gymnast of Atlantic/Cape green with envy, and the hookers on Pacific Ave marveled at Mr. Anarchy's flowing red cape.

Things became so bad that Mr. Anarchy ditched his wife of twenty years, sold his two children into white slavery, bought a $40,000 TV from AMAZON.COM, and subsequently married Delanco, NJ weirdo and oddity, Underdog Woman, aka Suzanne Muldowney.

The two gentle lunatics spent the holiday season walking the boardwalks and promenades of Southern New Jersey, lecturing strangers of their respected obsessions - anarchy and Underdog. It was lost on each other that Underdog stood for law, order and the American way. But love is a crazy thing......

Being away from New Jersey for such a period of time made Mr. Anarchy a bit soft to the ways and winds of the New Jersey street scene. Waianae ain't Camden, and Honolulu ain't Newark. New Jersey is top of the food chain, boos, and you always have to have your guard up - even in Haddonfield and Colts Neck.

One night, while strolling down Atlantic City's seedy off-season boardwalk, Mr. Anarchy's naivete and forgetfulness would prove catastrophic. While his wife, Underdog Woman, went to find a fire hydrant on which to urinate, Mr. Anarchy wandered past the Revel Casino, well into a confused ghetto-gentrification neighborhood, where blocks of new town homes intermingled with blocks of bombed-out row homes. Of course, the new neighbors get along famously.

For some unexplained reason, Mr. Anarchy suddenly left the boardwalk at Massachusetts Ave and entered upon the sand, on one of New Jersey's most pristine beaches, ripe with treasures, such as rebarb and abandoned shopping carts. A stretch of sand Bubbles from Nova Scotia would consider paradise. It was as if a projector beam suddenly transported Mr. Anarchy from the boards to the beach without a thought, and Mr. Anarchy's sudden appearance did not go unnoticed.

 

your posts have the intelligence of kim kardashian

written by donald sterling

 

This is one of the funniest statements I've read on here...simple yet effective! Metard ftw!!!

 

This is so obvious.... Marty Indeera Sandusky is Jean Grey and Mr. Anarchy is the Pheonix.

 

Wayne, did you have anything to do with that Christian conference? If so, what is with the 7 year olds asking me about how I would feel if I died today? I'm all for free speech but damn dude wth? The encroachment on my girl followed by the mass baptisms in the surf zone were unexpected. If you were there and you are truly a surfer, why place these people in harms way (i.e. Me surfing)? International palms. I had a fat girl run full speed into me while my hands were full. This was interesting. Was that you on longboard the other day?

 

the good thing about orlando is there is only one. domestic truck bomber, anyone?

 

Sweeeet, this will make friday so much better.

 

Ha, I like the Trailer Park Boys reference in the story.

 

Yet, where ever I am, there you are...............just minutes later. Go watch Fox News. You're BANNED from reading my posts. BANNED. 5 infraction points.

Ah, another one, Live4Truth. Yeah, we had it out awhile back. So of course, he looks for an "IN" to take a shot.

Of course both of them don't like me, but no matter where I go on Swellinfo...........there they are.

All of my haters, think I suck, but they read everything I write. That don't make no sense. People are quite odd.

You guys are so transparent. And your insult game is weak. Go take some lessons from 2013 Swellie Hater of the Year, Yankee, to get some pointers on how to hate.

Also, sometimes you guys claim a five word post as it was written by Proust or something. I don't know, there's all kinds out there, but the simple minds that some people have never ceases to amaze me.

I feel sorry for the world.

 

Okay, so if I remember correctly, a van just rolled up on the side of the road somewhere close to Bel Mar.... I am thinking they must take a detour and head through philly, get a couple cheese steaks and a pack of red tops, shoot some dope and then head down to Havre De Grace.... Just a minor detour.... Then maybe hop over to Rehoboth Beach....

Or better yet, once everyone "re-ups", bangs some smack, shi* their pants, they just hop on the southern train, boards in hand at the 30th street station in Philly .... Somebody can meet yall at Penn Station in Bmore with hookers and a smile.

Well, it might take some time for Sand Blaster and I to make our way to the Mid-Atlantic train station. We have a case of bud light and we are pushing the General Lee to her limits up the 95. Leaving crushed beer cans in our wake, honking and flicking off anyone with northern plates as we weave in and out of traffic. We will be there soon. As you guys load up the van, we are somewhere between Benson and Selma, NC. Only thing that might hold us up is a quick detour to the next Cracker Barrel.

 

enjoy the taste of your pedicure dog

love metard

<smooch>