We don't stand a chance against the njshredmachine's armies of tanned meat heads, all hopped up on redbull and light vodka, with a thirst for blood and protein powder. But we are many. I saw a guy out in sandbridge with the stars and bars on his board. The good ol' northern Virginia battle flag. I see ya, brother. 0600 tomorrow we storm the beaches of Belmar. General Lee, Out.
Started to fear the worst, gitcarter.....that you'd been taken by the freaky cackling driver of the white van of duct tape & doom.....
this is our number one enemy, we have to strike fast and loud. we have to out drink them which should be easy, then we need to make sure we disable their arms, the fist pump is a deadly weapon. we have to also take Canada there are plenty of redneck that will join the south there, plus french women we need those. sjb will supply the french women.
Socialists from New England will meet the true patriots of the south in the assault on the fascist state of NJ. We shall take over their capitol of Belmar, and we will split the city into four sectors, along with our allies of PR and California. Fly your banner high soldier. We shall meet in Belmar next time we meet.
The french women of Montreal also posses the finest of hashish. That, along with their long hairy legs, is enough reason to invade. Word of caution: Leave Seabrook NJ alone! This is a warning to all good southern surfer/soldiers. The women there glow in the dark and have six toes and webbing on each hand and foot. They can paddle faster than ya'll, so best to leave them be. Even though it is in close strategic proximity to the legendary northern surf breaks Rye-on-the-Rocks, and the Hampton Wall, leave Seabrook alone! Best to do a surgical strike on Newport,Martha's Vineyards and Nantucket. Take away their playgrounds for the rich. Hit em where it hurts. Then they will have to hand over Montauk.
Hey hey hey remember we're seceding up here too...we will grant all wave riders access. You can have the rich and do with them what you please.
History really just repeats itself... First SI took on MSW and won it's independence from the Brits, now it's civil war between the north and south. More shall be revealed in time. #LONGLIVETHENORTH
Down here in Nawth Cackalackey we've got the stills running full bore 24x7. We're gonna use it to fuel our monster trucks and bass boats, no need for gasoline anymore, 200 proof ethyl all the way. Marine invasion fleet is at the ready, along with the freshly out of boot camp 17th Dolphin volunteer regiment. And being that we're the nursery for dang near every Atlantic shark species they are all technically southern by birth and have already volunteered. Admiral Mary Lee (great great great shark granddaughter of The General) is gathering her forces...samples of hair gel and fake tan spray are being dispersed to all shark species so they can identify their targets. Git ready for the great shark hunt of 2014, and I ain't talk about that SI idgit.
Make sure BrewEngineer reviews any necessary fuel injector / carburetor gasket mods on all vessels... -OH based fuels can be harsh on some engines carburetion systems. Additionally he can verify that production systems are running at top efficiency/capacity ... That is all.
Well I don't really know what all them fancy pants werds are but I'm sure Mistah Brew does. Word has it he actually passed 6th grade! That Brew's a sly one, even knows his ABCs.
Actually he is scrawling out his first algebraic equation... gas laws are fundamental to his career path.
I think we'll be safe as long as we stay up North. No way the Southerners can afford the gas and tolls to get up here. Even if they did they'd never be able to read all the street signs and find Belmar.