Wetsuites for Big Balls

Your balls are ugly and don't cook good.

 

Nor can they surf. Not like my friends ballz.

 

Mr. Sniffer I can offer advice:

You'll have to buy O'Neill wetsuites, as they are American wetsuites equipped to handle large testicles. Your testies will feel secure, as if Jack had a comfortable hold on your sack. You will harness the rugged sense of Northern California adventure. Your testicles will prosper and continue to grow.

If you get a Rip Curl you will be fitted too tightly, as Aussies are small from bad genes and Australian Rules Footy.

Avoid Quiksilver suites, as only small-balled, shaved-head surfers use them. You may find yourself on the set of a bad Hollywood Television show featuring life guards and that dude from Night Rider.

Xcel no good neither. Too many people have them on this site and we all know these guys don't have big balls.

Now if you can find them, Piping Hot and Victory were great suites with extended pouches for the scrotum.

 

this tread is *screaming* for some mad Photoshop skillz. Calling Dr. Metard............

 

"as if Jack had a comfortable hold on your sack..."

 

There are several cats on here making cases for Poster of the Week status but Bi-stater is simply killing it today. Call him the Undertaker.

 

Spicoli, Mr. Sniffer complimented my post.

So of course you have to praise someone else just to make me feel bad.

You do this everyday just trying to make me upset and sad.

You are a sick, sick Jan Brady-type.

Hey Spicoli, what brand of wetsuite do you use? Or is that classified info also?

Spicoli, what ****ing town are you in today?

Hey Spicoli how big are your testicles? Do you use Rip Curl or O'Neill?

Spicoli, how's your house in Hull doing these days. I hope Weymouth and Hingham punks don't break in and party at your pad while you are traveling the country "working." Come on man just admit you're set-up from family. Oh yeah, I forgot they are 1890's Chinese railroad workers. SS wishes they were because they would have the nectar of the Gods. You know Spicoli sometimes I wish I was that Asian guy in East of Eden and I would move to SF and smoke opium. And visit cat houses with my dope d!ck which would make me a sexual conflict dynamo.

Spicoli, you ever smoke opium?

Hey Spicoli, when do you go international?

Hey, why don't you hook up Seldom with a job? He even likes skateboards.