Quiver, judges, and breaks of choice for Surfing Survivor reality show

Discussion in 'All Discussions' started by EmassSpicoli, Oct 20, 2013.

  1. EmassSpicoli

    EmassSpicoli Well-Known Member

    Apr 16, 2013
    Let's say there's a reality TV show in "vote you off the peak" format. It is judged by three all-timers (for one reason or another) and two teams are coached by two current pros, each of the 8 weeks you travel to different breaks on 6 continents that have a certain grade of conditions (for better or worse), and one perk of being a contestant is that each week you get the stick of your choice for the break and conditions you'll be at during that episode.

    Respond to this thread if you choose, and fill in the following choices if you were given the role of producer then also for competitor:
    Examples for responses are entered, use the same format for yours.

    PRODUCER'S PICKS

    3 Judges
    Must be alive and notable in a major way to the surfing culture. Two of the three picks can be ASP pros or former ASP pros, while the third has to be either a cultural figure or a niche (big wave) surfer.
    Judge 1: Tom Curren
    Judge 2: Rabbit Bartholomew
    Judge 3: Micah Peasley

    2 Team Coaches
    Must be two active ASP professionals.

    Team 1 Coach: KS
    Team 2 Coach: Mick

    Break Categories
    1) Must choose a break from each of the six continents other than Antarctica. NOTE: Hawaii is not part of North America and is a Polynesian sub-region of Oceania.
    2) You have two Wild Card choices that can repeat a continent as long as they satisfy a break category. These will be best used to satisfy the less than stellar break types.
    3) You can use a given break for a given category if that break has conditions that fit into a category on at least a semi-regular basis (certain seasons or weeks) since even world-class breaks don't always have bombing surf and are attractive since they offer different conditions by the day or time of year. Many breaks will fall into several categories at different times of year.


    Big Wave Break: Maverick's - United States (N. AMERICA)
    Gnarl Break: Shipstern's - Australia (OCEANIA)
    Right-hand Barrell Break: Jeffrey's Bay - S. Africa (AFRICA)
    Left-Hand Barrell Break: Supertubos - Portugal (EUROPE)
    Overhead-DOH Point Break: Punta de Lobos - Chile (S. AMERICA)
    Chest-Head Glassy Beach Break: Brawa Beach - Indonesia (ASIA)
    Waist-Chest Mush Break: Short Sands, Maine - United States (WILD CARD 1)
    Ankle-Waist Mush Break: Dewey Beach, Delaware - United States (WILD CARD 2)

    COMPETITOR'S PICKS - BOARDS & WETTY

    Must be brand-name since this show is sponsored, and larger independent shapers that would have a bankroll to get on as a sponsor can be used in addition to major manufacturers. You can pick the same board for different categories of breaks (i.e. same board for RH Barrell & LH Barrell. For big wave boards and such, your board choices will be assumed to be for tow-in unless you specify it is a paddle-in.

    Big Wave Break: Maverick's - Gerry Lopez Tiger Tow-In 9'
    Gnarl Break: Shipstern's - Merrick Gun 8'4
    Right-hand Barrell Break: Jeffrey's Bay - Coil Qualifier 5'10
    Left-Hand Barrell Break: Supertubos - Coil Qualifier 5'10
    Overhead-DOH Point Break: Punta de Lobos - Bush Man Pancho Sullivan 6'10
    Chest-Head Glassy Beach Break: Brawa Beach - Coil Widerboard 5'8
    Waist-Chest Mush Break: Short Sands, Maine - CI Pod 5'6
    Ankle-Waist Mush Break: Dewey Beach, Delaware - Airwalk Widdly 3'1

    Wetsuits and Apparel: XCEL
     
  2. LOSTsoul

    LOSTsoul Well-Known Member

    543
    Apr 29, 2009
    Dude u need a fresh hobby. #forumaddict #howdoyouhavethetime
     

  3. EmassSpicoli

    EmassSpicoli Well-Known Member

    Apr 16, 2013
    Dear Pride of Newark,
    Efforts were made to keep the complexity of words used in the original post to a sixth-grade reading level to accommodate illiterate T-C's like yourself. Since it's over your head, still, you can have your toothless mom's substance abuse counselor translate it for you. In the meantime, enjoy the refreshment of a tall, cold glass of STFU.

    Sincerely,
    A member of society who has an IQ more than EC summer ocean temps
     
  4. seldom seen

    seldom seen Well-Known Member

    Aug 21, 2012
    Come on Spicoli, the hashtag thing was pretty funny. #dontgetallbutthurt
     
  5. EmassSpicoli

    EmassSpicoli Well-Known Member

    Apr 16, 2013
    #justputtingthetrollbackunderhisrock and #keepingthesewaterspure of #jerzthunders

    My bad, thought this was a #surfforum or something
     
  6. Special Whale Glue

    Special Whale Glue Well-Known Member

    Oct 8, 2011
    Says the 49 page NFL thread overlord. ;)
    Seriously though, you have a lot of free time and yes I'm jealous. What did you do with that time before SI?
    Please don't curse me out and refer to a bunch of things I'm unaware of:) Just answer or tell me to blow a donkey or something. (Donkey noise here)
     
  7. Poseidon

    Poseidon Well-Known Member

    111
    Aug 23, 2013
    loser-meme-generator-maaaaaann-you-are-one-pathetic-loser-8bcee0.jpg

    (Donkey noise here)
     
  8. Slashdog

    Slashdog Well-Known Member

    May 22, 2012
    "This week... on A & E's Forum Addicts.... a young man fights a debilitating posting addiction. Meanwhile; someone blows a donkey." (Donkey noise here)
     
  9. ClemsonSurf

    ClemsonSurf Well-Known Member

    Dec 10, 2007
    This is a hard place to be imaginative. Most sheep don't like to know the plan they just want to follow. I think its a great idea. It pretty much follows the same idea the UFC took with The Ultimate Fighter. Of course it would promote the over commercialization of surfing but let's get serious, our little secret is pretty well known.

    I think a show like this would be great to show what a top tier surfer has to do to stay at the level and how a lower skilled surfer can progress given the instruction, time and resources.

    You donkey boys would be the biggest fan boys of this show.
     
  10. seldom seen

    seldom seen Well-Known Member

    Aug 21, 2012
    I don't have cable mang.
     
  11. leethestud

    leethestud Well-Known Member

    Aug 12, 2010
    man you should go adopt a dog or take up Frisbee golf or something.
     
  12. njsurfer42

    njsurfer42 Well-Known Member

    Nov 9, 2009
    since it's going to be flat here on the east coast for the near future, i'm going to play along...but if we're going to do this, let's force the competitors to be skilled in ALL aspects of surfing, not just contest-style hp shortboarding.

    njsurfer42's PICKS

    3 Judges
    Must be alive and notable in a major way to the surfing culture. Two of the three picks can be ASP pros or former ASP pros, while the third has to be either a cultural figure or a niche (big wave) surfer.
    Judge 1: Tom Curren
    Judge 2: Joel Tudor
    Judge 3: Mark Healey

    2 Team Coaches
    Must be two active ASP professionals.

    Team 1 Coach: Steph Gilmore
    Team 2 Coach: KS

    Break Categories
    1) Must choose a break from each of the six continents other than Antarctica. NOTE: Hawaii is not part of North America and is a Polynesian sub-region of Oceania.
    2) You have two Wild Card choices that can repeat a continent as long as they satisfy a break category. These will be best used to satisfy the less than stellar break types.
    3) You can use a given break for a given category if that break has conditions that fit into a category on at least a semi-regular basis (certain seasons or weeks) since even world-class breaks don't always have bombing surf and are attractive since they offer different conditions by the day or time of year. Many breaks will fall into several categories at different times of year.


    Big Wave Break: Aileen's - Ireland (Europe)
    Gnarl Break: Shipstern Bluff - Australia (OCEANIA)
    Right-hand Barrell Break: Jeffrey's Bay - S. Africa (AFRICA)
    Left-Hand Barrell Break: Uluwatu - Indonesia (Asia)
    Overhead-DOH Point Break: Punta de Lobos - Chile (S. AMERICA)
    Chest-Head Glassy Beach Break: Biarritz - France (Europe) (WC #1)
    Waist-Chest Mush Break: Cardiff Reef - California, United States (N. America)
    Ankle-Waist Mush Break: Virginia Beach - Virginia, United States (N. America) (WC #2)
    *seriously? why even include this last category?*

    COMPETITOR'S PICKS - BOARDS & WETTY

    Must be brand-name since this show is sponsored, and larger independent shapers that would have a bankroll to get on as a sponsor can be used in addition to major manufacturers. You can pick the same board for different categories of breaks (i.e. same board for RH Barrell & LH Barrell. For big wave boards and such, your board choices will be assumed to be for tow-in unless you specify it is a paddle-in.

    Big Wave Break: Aileen's - Ireland (Europe) 10'0" Christenson gun (quad)
    Gnarl Break: Shipstern Bluff - Australia (OCEANIA) 6'6" Stretch roundtail quad (tow in)
    Right-hand Barrell Break: Jeffrey's Bay - S. Africa (AFRICA) 6'6" CI Black Beauty
    Left-Hand Barrell Break: Uluwatu - Indonesia (Asia) 6'0" Lost Mini-Driver
    Overhead-DOH Point Break: Punta de Lobos - Chile (S. AMERICA) 6'8" FCD KMRP bonzer
    Chest-Head Glassy Beach Break: Biarritz - France (Europe) (WC #1) 6'2" Rusty Bali Single
    Waist-Chest Mush Break: Cardiff Reef - California (N. America) 5'8" Lost Layzboy
    Ankle-Waist Mush Break: Virginia Beach - Virginia (N. America) (WC #2) 5'5" Bing Puck


    Wetsuits and Apparel: Rip Curl[/QUOTE]
     
  13. yankee

    yankee Well-Known Member

    Sep 26, 2008
    Ditto: ditched my tv 2+ yrs ago. Besides, I'm still mentally drained from the 'Hello' thread...
     
  14. seldom seen

    seldom seen Well-Known Member

    Aug 21, 2012
    Hahaha F*kin' A! Who needs tv after that thread!? Funny thing is I've been cable free for some time now, just had it reconnected in the basement for my roommate...the habit's so broken now that even with it available it's just not even an option.
     
  15. EmassSpicoli

    EmassSpicoli Well-Known Member

    Apr 16, 2013
    [/QUOTE]

    nj42-
    Good stuff. Love the Steph Gilmore inclusion. Would really boost ratings. You were right on saying how the competitors should be skilled in ALL aspects of surfing. That's the point of the show, and competitors would be eliminated if their weak link was the worst out of the group on a given episode at one of the breaks. Much like InkMaster how those artists get eliminated unless they can do all types of tattoos. The reason for the Ankle-Waist Mush Break inclusion was to see how comical we could get with the responses and I was hoping some people would pick a SUP at some crap-ass EC or NE break that was a lake this summer. Even on the show though, that could be a legit episode as it would be entertaining seeing the bigger wave riders struggle with garbage conditions backed by little swell.

    Good response mang. It's funny how the ones trying to rip on my post and "too much free time" happen to be several of the most frequent posters of SI and one can only imagine how much more time they're spending reading other posts. That's a lot of damn time spent by them here. Ahhhh, the irony.

    Clemmdog is right, this show would get sick ratings and most of you all would be glued to it.

    So either have fun like nj42 in a good response or spend your own over-abundance of free time debating 68 pages of whether or not people should have the right to procreate in that other thread. Nerds. Or...just GET OFF MY PEAK


    FREE TIME IS YOUR OWN DAMN CHOICE
     
  16. Slashdog

    Slashdog Well-Known Member

    May 22, 2012
    Dude... most sheep don't like to create, they just want to watch.

    Put a show on like this and you'll have every sitcom-loving Hollister-draped sack of corpulence who sponged once as a kid asking you dumb questions whenever you go somewhere with a board. And if you want to see what time, money, and coaching can do for a low level surfer, can't you just check out the Hamptons or Orange County?

    Surfing is highly commercialized, thats true. Despite the fact that Capitalism has already co-opted it, along with skateboarding, there is still an inherent subversiveness in both; they keep us outside, creatively interacting with environments, the way manimals were meant to. They can also provide kids with creative values that counteract the pressures of team-sports mentality and corporate douche-squadery... plus, maybe it keeps some kids off of junk and/or Kassers vodka.....

    F**k this show, f**k cable, and f**k the whole television industry. I'd rather watch a documentary interviewing the crackheads of AC about what they think of D-Trump. If I were the producer I would load the boards in a van and bring the instructors to a low-income beach community and spread some stoke where it belongs....
     
  17. sisurfdogg

    sisurfdogg Well-Known Member

    Jun 17, 2013
    Hey it's Monday and it's flat. I'll play.

    PRODUCERS PICKS

    Judges:
    1. Shawn Thompson
    2. Occy
    3. Greg Knoll

    Coaches
    1. KS
    2. Waveslayer

    BREAKS / BOARDS

    1. Big Wave Break - Pico Alto - Peru (SOUTH AMERICA) 1. **** Brewer Elephant Gun 10'6
    2. Gnarl Break - Dungeons - S. Afrika (AFRICA) 2. Towsurfer 5'6"
    3. Right Barrel - Snapper Rocks - Gold Coast (AUSTRALIA) 3. CI Proton 6"0"
    4. Left Barrel - Pipeline - Hawaii (OCEANA) 4. T & C Semi-Gun 7"6"
    5. OH-DOH Point - Mundaka - Spain (EUROPE) 5. CI Fort Knox 6"4"
    6. Chest-Head Glassy Beachie - Pavones - Costa Rica (CENTRO) 6. Orion Swallowtail 6"2"
    7. Waist-Chest Mush - Phuket - Thailand (ASIA) 7. Kechle Pug Fish 5"8'
    8. Ankle-Waist Much - Cocoa Pier - United States (NORTH AMERICA) 8. WaveJet 7'4"

    WETSUITS by VERSACE

    Question: Who would you pick for competitors?
     
    Last edited: Oct 21, 2013
  18. sisurfdogg

    sisurfdogg Well-Known Member

    Jun 17, 2013
    His name is **** ****ing Brewer for God's sake!
     
  19. MFitz73

    MFitz73 Well-Known Member

    Aug 21, 2010
    why has no one included a break in New Jersey? 23 footer fools!!!
     
  20. MFitz73

    MFitz73 Well-Known Member

    Aug 21, 2010
    Also maybe there could be a bench off during the show somehow...