Shark or dolphin? A trip down the east coast...

I'm from New England but I'm down south surfing for the week. I figured I would post my surf trip on here as it progresses because... because I am a narcissist and I seek approval from strangers? Probably?

Sunday: We were out at Tybee Island GA by the jetty picking up choppy (blue) thigh highs and the occasional belly high. Lefts and rights, crumbly but the occasional barrel being pitched, I was lucky enough to snag one. I paddled out on the new ...Lost Couch Potato and fell in love. The thing picks up like a 9' long board and is surprisingly responsive. My old lady is on a 7' custom made by McDermott Shapes of ME and that thing cleans up on small-medium waves. SOUTHERN HOSPITALITY IS NO JOKE. I've never seen a friendlier line up. People were offering up waves, sharing waves, passing up waves because they thought the other guy was in a better position, and very outgoing. Granted the waves weren't good enough to fight over, but nonetheless everybody was abnormally friendly. Three girls in the line-up, all of whom could surf, and were 9-10s of some freckled presumably Irish descent. My girlfriend agreed, and we got to thinking that northern New England beach goers are generally disgusting white trash with sleevless American Flag eagled out shirts and a diabetic marsupial fupa pouch, or beautiful French Canadians. A New England 10 is a Georgia 4. Anyway, one of the 10s spotted a fin. "Shark or dolphin?" is not a game I am used to playing. On the other hand "Whale or Mainer?" is a little more up my alley. The last three of us in the water got out about 30 minutes before dusk at the site of the fin, and I may have peed a little involuntarily when she mentioned it. For dinner we ate out in Savannah---fried gator fingers and gator gumbo for appetizers, shrip po' boy, and a steak salad.

Monday: Afternoon session at Burke's Beach on Hilton Head Island, SC, of knee highs, and the occasional waist high set. Not all that powerful but clean enough and down the line lefts and rights. HHI is not the ideal spot to surf, but I have an in with crashing here for free. Oh, and only one other dude in the water. Some younger skinny dude on a shortboard and a sponge (boardrobe change) that was working the ish out of some small surf. Kid shreds. Fun fun day on the Couch Potato. I was really amazed that I could pick up and surf knee highs on a 6' board. Hail the Potato. Dinner: lobstah, shrimp, and jasmin rice.

Tuesday: Afternoon Hilton Head (Burkes) session of CHOPPY rippy currenty waist highs with the occasional rogue chesty. Mostly mushy but the waves on HHI are super shouldery and there is an occasional huge barrel that gets tossed out on certain sections. There is a "winter storm" by southern standards passing through the south, and the wind was whipping. The current was extremely strong--freaky strong. Spend most of my time kooked out standing in belly high water trying to stay stationary. Caught a few decent waves but was more concerned with not drowning and making sure the ol' lady didn't have one of those "you dragged me out here" low blood sugar meltdown moments. Then I saw another fin---time for another round of "Shark or dolphin?"!!! I kept looking in that direction about 75 yards away and I saw it swimming with a wave--no joke---like a hallmark card. But it happened so fast and my eyesight is average at a distance so I couldnt tell if it was a shark or dolphin. I alerted the Mrs. and we started paddling in---as the tide had come in a bit we realized that we were on a sandbar and hit that creepy deep part before the shore. Its not usually creepy, but when you see a mysterious fin, it becomes extra creepy. Made it to shore and spotted the fin a few more times. 80% sure it was a dolphin, but 20% uncertainty mixed with sub-par surf = time to call it. The stitching on my Excel 6/5 left chest/armpit started coming undone. I only need a 4/3 right now, but the 6/5 was extra toasty with the air in the 40s and the whipping wind. Dinner: steelhead trout and veggie pasta.

More to come...

 

Um... what?!?

FACT: Maine and NH are packed with fat white trash people, and if you don't believe me head to Jenness/OOB/Hampton on 4th of July weekend and count the sleeveless "freedom" XXXL t-shirts. EXTRA FACT: Vermonters are FAT too. I am a transplant. Learned to surf in RI, moved to VT from Oregon, NY prior to that.

Maine line-ups are great, but Southerners are outright friendly. I have no problems with Maine lineups or any lineups-- Ill wax a windshield and beat the ish out of Jon Doe and two of his closest friends. I stare down tourists, talk ish, and I am generally an outright menace. I am the guy that you and your friends paddled away from and said "What an a$$." After my first summer back in New England fighting for waves with surf schools and tourists, I radiate aggro energy in the water. Its refreshing to see a nice friendly line up, but as far as lineups go---I make my own luck, and I'll make it in the water and in the parking lot if I have to.

 

Northern NE is definitely awesome. I grew up in southern NE and the traffic got to me, but lately I've been noticing how green the area is.

My biggest "complaint" about the beaches in New England is parking in the summer. In NH the Mrs. and I drop our gear at the beach and one of us stays with it, and the other parks up to 1.5 miles away. We bring our long(skate)boards and skate to the break. Winter is awesome because its a ghost town!

 

I'm not above waxing glass, poking tires, or sizing folks up in the water. I've split a few lips and enjoyed watching people call AAA in my lifetime for various reasons. And although not by me, windshields do get waxed in NH from time to time. Ask around. I'm a New England raised jerk, and I do have a standing offer for anyone who invades my bubble. Thats called having a scrotum. I apologize if it makes you uncomfortable.

Just another hard hitting charger who moved to Vermont in search of the perfect JOB. Never claimed localism, but far from a tourist. Driving 2.5 hrs to the beach is called dedication. Tourists take up space, party waving Bics and running out in jean shorts with their diabetic family members to let waves break on their unnaturally broad backs. Lots of locals in Rye, but there are very few Anthony Kiedis looking enforcers pulling blades out at Jenness. I choose to avoid the pack and venture off into my own space, not so much out of respect but out of wanting to keep my wave count up. But when people want to invade my bubble I'm going to be a aggro about it, and I don't care where you are from unless you're some 6'8" body builder pulling up next to me in the lineup. Then I'd probably keep my mouth shut. Its some Discovery Channel ish bro--- If I think I can take you, I'm gonna run my mouth. If I think my teeth might wash up in Madagascar, I'll keep my mouth shut. Its the natural order.

Two types of people in this world bro: those who understand the natural order, and bald men with micro*****es. Which one are you?

 

I know! The Quebecois are notoriously bad. I have found folks to be quite friendly for the most part in the area once the summer pressure goes away. Everybody is on high alert in the summer.

Mad Atom I just might have to paddle out with you some time.

 

Fartmeister your welcome on my scrotum anytime---seems you've already found your way there.

As for knee high slop---bro I get two days a week to surf, so I take what I can get. Driving 2.5 hours for knee high slop is dedication.

As for my pictures--- my old lady is not really interested in taking pics when its decent. When its any bigger you cant take smart phone pics.

Those who do---- You're right, I am the gnarliest bro ever. I was aborted and raised myself in a trash can. I taught myself to read Cyrillic while taking a dump this morning. I've delivered 9 babies in stuck elevators by pure coincidence. I have 5 PhDs and I speak 14 languages, including Dog. I'm coupon savvy. I narrate Morgan Freeman's thoughts. Aliens don't abduct me, I abduct aliens. My saliva is a naturally occurring vaccine for Polio and boredom. And I date an educated Jewish woman.

 

This site makes my blood pressure go up.