Surfers and drugs

seldom, that was awesome.......sis, are there chics on the island? any other things, like cows? or burritos?, are there seeds in the ganja? how long we on this island for?

 

how about a bed and some Floyd. any of that there?

 

I’m going to chime in on this one. Whenever I come on the forum it’s usually when there’s little to no work to do at my office and I just cruise around some threads and read for the most part. But I’d like to share my experience with my addiction and how it correlated with my surfing.

I first learned how to surf when I was 14 and literally after I caught my first wave I knew I was hooked. I was addicted to the stoke and forever chasing that feeling of getting a good wave. I surfed whenever I could, getting rides to the beach, picking up used boards and building my quiver and collecting new gear along the way. All I thought about was surfing and was obsessed with it. It was a good and healthy obsession though, I was getting more fit the longer I stayed out in the water and always felt like a happier person after a paddle out. While I was in high school I tried drinking and smoking some bud, thought it was harmless and couldn’t be anything bad if everyone else was doing it. Tried it because someone offered and I wanted to fit in and be “cool.” Well after high school I didn’t even associate with the same people anymore but I continued to smoke. It lead to an everyday habit and never thought I had a problem. I thought it was normal to skip my college classes and get blazed out of my mind. I would surf after smoking and it most certainly affected it, and not in a good way. My reaction time was crap and I fell a whole lot more. I still surfed a lot but not as much as I once desired too. I was sometimes more happy to sick around being a couch potato baked out. Fast forward to when I was 20, me a couple buddies went down to VA beach one august to check out the ECSC contest. We were looking forward to it especially because the water temp was in the mid to high 70s and the forecast was for head high to overhead waves with light offshores. Got down there on a Thursday night, a day before the swell was supposed to fill in. Got our hotel room right on the beach and went right across the street to load up on booze. First time I ever tried a fourloko I chugged two of the damn things and had so much energy I went for a cruise on my longboard on the bike path down to 1st street where they were setting up for the contest and checked it all out. On the way back to the hotel which was on 14th street I felt the caffeine wear off and felt the alcohol hit me hard. I got so loaded so quick I ended up colliding with some dude on a bicycle head on, thus snapping my fibula in my right left in half. It was my own stupid embarrassing fault. But I got a script for percs at the ER and that’s when my opiate love affair started. I had surgery on my ankle and had those pills prescribed to me for a year and I wiped out on my sport bike (because I was still taking the pills and high as a kite) and effed up my left knee badly. I tore my quadricep below my knee cap and it was sticking out of my leg on the side of the road. More surgery and more painkillers, but this time a higher dose and more pills. I had to relearned how to surf after both leg injuries, and still have difficulties in some areas and will never be able to surf like I once did. Fast forward another year I’m still on them and had surgery on my fibula again to get the hardware removed. I found a new pain doctor whom prescribed me the same meds but at a dose three times higher than what I had been taking. I was taking so many pills a day, not only to keep myself from getting sick but to keep chasing that “high” because my tolerance had skyrocketed. The more I took, the less I surfed. It got to a point where I stopped surfing completely and only cared about how to get my next fix. I didn’t drink much anymore and I stopped smoking weed because it just wouldn’t compare to my drug of choice. I couldn’t keep up with my habit and the scripts I was getting for a month wouldn’t even last me barely a week. So I started buying them on the streets which eventually got too expensive so I tried out the cheaper alternative that is quite readily available in NJ. My doctor refused to write me anymore scripts because of the person I had become.

Here’s where the story turns around for the better. I looked at myself in the mirror one day and didn’t recognize the face looking back at me at all. I couldn’t believe what I had become. All the things I said I would never do or try when I was younger I was doing. I went from weighing 180 lbs before I broke my leg three years prior being very healthy and in fit shape, to about 135-140 lbs of skin and bones constantly getting sick, not eating right, smoking 2 packs a day, zero surfing or activity, barely working, not paying any bills, while only concerning myself with a habit that cost hundreds of dollars a day to support. I hated myself and I didn’t know what to do. The way I look at it I had three options, doctor shop to try and get more scripts, start driving to Camden every day, or check myself into a detox/rehab facility. I choose the latter. I physically, mentally, and spiritually could no longer continue on with how I had been living (or not living…) and I knew if I did, I was going to die. Scared out of my mind, I went to a rehab in mays landing and stepped up. They detoxed me there and I spent a little over two weeks there where I realized the drugs/alcohol were never my problem to begin with, they were actually my solution to my problem, which was MYSELF. I am my own problem, my mind and my way of thinking. I was impulsively making decision, acting on my obsessions behaving in a compulsive manner. It was somewhat of an epiphany. It felt good to not have anything in my system for the first few days in years and years of using one substance or another. I knew when I got out of there I didn’t want to go back to the life I had known, I wanted better for myself but didn’t know where to start. So I took the suggestion of the staff and counselors at the facility and went to a 12 step meeting my first day out of treatment. They told me that what I do in my first 24 hours out will determine how I’ll approach my recovery. I thought it was complete sh!t when they said it, but it was at least enough to get me to check out a meeting and get a feel for it. I’m glad I did, because I still regularly attend meetings and work steps with a sponsor now, trying to work on myself and help others struggling with addiction. A little more than two weeks ago I just celebrating my six months clean of all mind and mood altering chemicals and I can honestly say I never thought I’d live to see it. I’m a much happier person now, not because I stopped using altogether, but because I became aware that my way of thinking and acting is completely effed up whether I’m on chemicals or not. And since I’m aware of it I can work on my character defects and learn to change my ways. It’s not for everyone, but a better way of life is most certainly out there for those that are willing to find help, open minded to take suggestions from others, and can get honest with themselves and others. If you’re an addict it doesn’t matter if you surf or not but It does make perfect sense because I know I’m addicted to surfing, just like other things. As I’m sure most if not all on this forum know how addicting surfing can be, it’s almost logical that surfing and addiction can go hand in hand, with mixed results of course. There’s a lot of people out there struggling with addiction, surfers and non surfers alike, most whom need help but don’t get it. If you want help you must seek it out, as with anything in life nothing is just handed to you, you have to want to change in order to change along with having to know you need help and having that courage do actually ask for help. Which for a lot of people is the most difficult part, it was for me. I knew I needed help for a while, I just didn’t have the balls to ask anyone. I had to surrender to myself and my addiction first and foremost.

I’m part of an anonymous fellowship, but I will always be a drug addict, I will die a drug addict. But that doesn’t mean I have to die because of my disease of addiction nor do I ever have to use again. I have my choice back now and I’m choosing to not put another one in me for today and call myself a recovering addict. I’ve accepted what and where I am in life and can move forward. I’ve been experiencing so many new things and people and doing my best to enjoy my life. I’m not perfect by any means and still have a lot of work to do, but I have hope now which before when I was using I had zero hope and felt worthless, and kept it all to myself putting a mask on around others seeming like I was completely fine and “normal.” I can honestly say I’m happy with my life today, even though there are still a lot of things wrong that I need to take care of. I caused a lot of wreckage but I can take responsibility for my actions now, which for this addict is a huge leap forward in a positive direction. And to my enjoyment, I’ve been surfing more than ever now. Got back out in the water for the first time in a year about two weeks out of rehab and that was in the summer. I’ve hit almost every big swell we’ve had in the past six months and loved every freezing minute of it. Every wave, every wipe out, every shiver I got to enjoy. I’m in better shape than I’ve been in a long time and have been surfing as good as I ever have since I broke my leg years ago. It’s a miracle in itself that I can still physically surf at all. I have the utmost gratitude for the smallest things in the world now and have been more stoked than ever.

I know this has been a very longwinded post but to those of you who’ve read it all I hope you could get something out of this. If there’s anyone out there that’s struggling with addiction or using every day, day after day wanting to get off that hamster wheel, there is hope and help out there. All you have to do is ask for some assistance.

 

From my story you and I can identify with a lot. I couldn’t control my use of painkillers and ultimately went down a road I never thought I would before. I’m glad to hear you were able to get off the painkillers on your own and stay off them. I literally feel you on the physical pain part having to deal with my own pain on a daily basis. Advil/Tylenol along with some meditating go a long way for me. I’m interested in trying yoga as another natural pain reliever and method of staying healthy.

I can’t fully agree with you on the government making everything legal and letting it sort itself out though. That will introduce a whole new array of problems and unneeded losses of life. But the most annoying part of the whole pharmaceutical industry that produces all these opiate medications is that they almost WANT you to get hooked on the stuff. They couldn’t care less if you end up on heroin after trying their initial pain medications, because they are making initial profits on the opiate pain meds, and then once they’ve got you hooked on them they can offer out other meds to deal with the withdraw and not being able to kick it. Such drugs like suboxone, methadone, librum, etc and make profits off those “medications.” I know of people who have been on subs for years and abuse and sell that now. It’s marketed like a cessation drug but they want to keep you hooked on that then to keep raking in the money. It sadly is all about the money. Same goes for tobacco and pharmaceutical companies leaning on the government organizations against ecigs/vaporizers. They are scientifically and medically shown to be a safer alternative to traditional tobacco cigarettes but all these companies/organizations would rather keep making money off of their tobacco products and cessation products than see people actually get better. They want you to stay sick so they can keep earning money.

Addiction truly is insanity. A normal non-addicted person will most likely always have difficulty understand the whole “why can’t you just have 1 or 2 drinks?” or “why can you just stop drinking/using at any point?” I think that’s amazing that you turned your life around thirty years ago, a true accomplishment and I commend you on that.

Glad to hear you got out of Ocean County. I know firsthand how bad it is there. My girl is from Manahawkin and I literally had to pull her out of her parents house and have her live with me in order for her to want to stay clean. It was just too easy to get crap down there, could walk down any street in that neighborhood or go to a wawa or whatever and get a few bags. It’s awesome to hear you got out while you could and made a difference in your life for the better, I wish you the continuing best of luck.

 

Best response all day to any thread.

 

ZombieSurfer - thanks for sharing a painful story, I hope it gives inspiration to others to get their life in order. Glad to see you got your stoke back.

Them painkillers are evil. Had to take them for my back issues. Would always have to stop cold turkey after a week as I could already start feeling their hooks into my body and mind. Pain sucks, being a slave to a pill/etc. sucks worse.

 

Anytime, and feels good to be stoked again!

And you ain't kidding, I forgot to mention in my above posts that 99% of the prescription opiate pain medication manufactured all over the world is consumed solely in the United States. That's ridiculous itself and furthermore shows/proves epidemic opiate abuse going on in our country.

 

If anyone is interested watch "The Oxycontin Express". Google it, it's free to watch online and on many sites. Its a documentary that covers how rampant this problem is and how everyone is sweeping it under the rug in the name of the almighty dolla. Apparently you can just drive down I-95 in Florida and you can go from doc to clinic to doc to clinic and load up on all the pills you want. Sickening...

 

When my wife finally went off the opiates, post-surgery recovery, she went through big time withdrawal. She was puking, couldn't sleep, and overly emotional all the time. She was only taking the min dosage as well. I used to have fun mixing alcohol and a little codeine in college, but pain pills are bad news. Good stories are being shared here. Let this be a lesson to anyone looking to play around with opiates. Addiction is a life changing thing.

 

I don't think pot ever harmed me,my job,or my surfing.im not someone who smokes all day everyday,i do smoke everyday but not til night time after work.honestly I try not to smoke before I surf,because after u smoke u don't want to go anywhere.i actually learned to surf while I was stoned lol.I got my drivers liscense stoned.i went to school stoned,and I had good grades.

everyone is different.i seen people go from pot to coke,and from there eventually to the needle.i limit myself to certain things.i don't rely on anyone for money,thats what being old is all about,working 60 hrs a week.if the waves are too big il sit out and watch.if I got something important to do I wont smoke.i quit smoking many times.I quit for 3 years as a teen when I got on probation.quit again when I was 20 to try to get a union job that never happened.i quit for another 4 yrs for the girl I was with at the time.

eventually its all about being bored and nothing to do,or stress so il smoke some weed.i don't get retarded when I smoke,most people cant tell the difference.saying pot affects your work.i was on a job a few years ago down in monmouth county,it was the new highlands bridge.i was a helper for a crew erecting a bridge.il never forget these 2 guys I met.they were the smartest people when it comes to very technical shyt,and they were the biggest pot heads.most crewmembers would have a cig every hour or so,these guys would smoke a fat blunt.the work they did while high was astounding.all my job was was grinding and drilling holes for the rivots.these 2 guys all by themselves would pull the beams up with the crane,guide them in place,bolt them down.the bosses knew they smoked but could never tell them anything because their work was flawless.

and on to andy irons.i hate when people try to refer to him as a drug addict world champion.thats not the way to remember someone,by the one bad thing they did while all the greatness was ignored.i was lucky enough to see the irons bros come up,like how jjf is now.they were destined to be great.andy was part of the ...lost crew,and anyone who ever watched lost movies know how they partied.i really don't know what to say about his death,that he od'd on street drugs,or maybe mixed the wrong prescription drugs.but doing drugs everyday isn't going to kill u when ur in ur 30s.od will.i doubt he won his titles while on drugs.for me,a good surf for me would be surfing a hurricane swell in late august while its still 95degrees out with no crowd,at nighttime,come out light a bonfire and barbeque some burgers while smoking a blunt and watching the sun set.i don't ask for much,im happy with the little things in life,like a good day at the beach.last time I smoked on the beach in the winter was last yr in February,and I lit it and it blew out my hands and flew away.i was phucking pissed

 

now when I say nighttime I mean surfing from 6 to 830pm while the sun is going down and the beaches are closed.anytime I get out the water I shiver,so I try not to leave the water til im done,my body is weird like that.i can see some of u saying how do u watch the sun set if ur surfing at night....well that's how

 

I've smoked for 43 years. I speak 2 languages, got a Masters license, and own my own bidniz. Don't do drug li'l chirren.

 

That's what's up homie. You got your shizz straight and poke smot responsibly. I respect that my man.

 

I'm from Manahawkin. Who is your girl if you don't mind sharing I probably know her.

 

Is crazy one of the languages or do you actually speak 3?

 

that's friggen awesome!!!

 

define know