Near-Death/Injury experiences?

Two of the smartest things I ever did was NOT marrying my ex-gf and...marrying my wife.

 

You got lucky you weren't there (14th st.) 15 yrs ago when the 4 old ladies tried to do an el rollo off the 5th floor of the parking garage in their car. Only got half way around and splatted on the roof.

 

That woulda been sick if they landed it.

 

My step dad's favorite check to write every month is his alimony check because it reminds him of how lucky he is not to still be married to the b!tch. He smiles all the way to the mailbox.

 

A little shorter too. That sudden stop is a killer.

 

thanks for the help i'm back from my nap and…and….what were we…..

 

Awesome thing about being old, you get to meet new people everyday.

 

New X Games Senior division comp? Of course the first one should be held in Boca Raton, or maybe Belmar wouldn't mind hosting it.

 

Dude, I'm dead right now.

Me and Hamburger cooked-up 5-Hour Energy drinks into a smokeable oil base we called 125-Hour Energy. I guess I took one too many blasts.

Being dead is pretty cool, actually.

I died in Camden one day too, but I got narcanned. Snorted one bag only. So that stuff was primo, or had fentanyl in it.

Now that's a shocker coming-to in a hospital, and dudes telling you that you died. I don't know, I had a shat load of Kasser's Premium Vodka that day, too. Maybe I just collapsed on Broadway, and people thought I was OD'd due to the location. I didn't see any lights or tunnels anything which was pretty disappointing.

Ah, good times....good times.

 

Dude Senior X Games! That'll give us all something to do when we can't move anymore.


Bear that 125-Hour Energy must be intense.

 

il pray for u sir,i hope u can get undead lol

 

Gun to head at kensington and hunting Park , gun to back of head at 22nd and York. Got caught in crossfire this year on my street at Temple University. . . .Surfing wise Just a few close calls going head first into a shallow reef In Hawaii on the west side of Oahu , and a double wave hold down surfing Moss Landing California when i was younger

 

Thas right. Bingo!

 

You need to relocate my man. I won't even ask you what you are doing at 22nd and York, ya know? Can't say no one ever flashed the steel at me before in Baltimore, but I was in the wrong neighborhood and they weren't selling girl scout cookies in Park Heights at the time.

 

i never been to Baltimore,but I did see the wire,and its supposedly based on true events in bmor,I think its probably the Newark of Maryland.newark is bad ummmmm kay

 

Then stay the hell home, hawkfart. Little ***** ass kiddies who've been crippled by mummsy & da-da. The world's a rough place, it ain't fair & it doesn't care about you or anyone else. Get that through your little fairy princess noggin.

 

When the zombies come I'm calling Yankee.