The Lighter Side

Philadelphia law firm
An old, staunch Philadelphia law firm finally decided to move forward into the 21st century. They were going to allow a woman to become a partner in the firm. A practice never thought of in the past.

There was a problem - there were three women fully qualified to be partner, but this was an old firm and the thought of bringing three females in as partners at the same time was anathema to them.

They decided to hold a partner's meeting to discuss the issue. During the meeting various selection processes were discussed. All fell short. In the late hours a member suggested adding $1,000 extra to each woman's paycheck and based on how they responded the decision to pick one of them could be made.

The following Friday each woman was given $1,000 extra in her pay.

One woman immediately went to accounting and explained that they had over-paid her by $1,000. She wrote a personal check to the firm in that amount so at the end of the day everything would be correct.

The second woman also went to accounting and explained that the firm had overpaid her by $500. She too wrote a personal check to the firm for $500 so at the end of the day everything would be correct.

The third woman said nothing... keeping all the money.

The following week the partners met once again to discuss the three candidates.

The eldest member of the firm stated 'it is clear we must take the woman who returned the full $1,000 - we are a firm that depends on integrity and honesty and her actions exemplify these traits.' Many nodded in agreement.

A middle-aged member spoke up. 'I am not so sure,' he said 'Our lives revolve around compromise. It is our life's blood. I think the woman who returned half of the money and kept half of it represents our actions better than any.' Again, many heads nodded.

The youngest partner now spoke up. He said 'This is the 21st century! We are paid to be aggressive, to get the best possible result for our clients. I am certain the woman who kept all the money will be the best fit as partner as we go forward.' Once again heads were nodding.

So

Which woman did they pick??


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The one with the biggest tatas

 

NEVER UNDERESTIMATE AN OLD GUY

A banker saw his old friend Tom, an eighty-year old rancher, in town.
Tom had lost his wife a year or so before and rumor had it that he was marrying a ‘mail order’ bride.

Being a good friend, the banker asked Tom if the rumor was true.

Tom assured him that it was. The banker then asked Tom the age of his new bride to be.

Tom proudly said, ‘She’ll be twenty-one in November.’

Now the banker, being the wise man that he was, could see that the sexual appetite of a young woman could not be satisfied by an eighty-year- old man.
Wanting his old friend’s remaining years to be happy the banker tactfully suggested that Tom should consider getting a hired hand to help him out on the ranch, knowing nature would take its own course.

Tom thought this was a good idea and said he would look for one that afternoon.

About four months later, the banker ran into Tom in town again.

‘How’s the new wife?’, asked the banker.

Tom proudly said, ‘Good – she’s pregnant.’

The banker, happy that his sage advice had worked out, continued, ‘And how’s the hired hand?’

Without hesitating, Tom said, ‘She’s pregnant too.’

Don’t ever underestimate us old guys.

 

Global warming is one thing, but look at the photo to see what is happening if we continue to clear our forests. We have to stop cutting down trees! This is getting really serious.

Click here: Look-what-happens-when-we-cut- down-too-many-trees-.JPG (600×656)

 

On Friday, A hooded robber burst into a bank and, at gunpoint, forced the tellers to load their cash into

a plain brown bag.

As the robber approached the door, one brave customer grabbed the hood and pulled it off,

revealing the robber's face.
Without a moment's hesitation, the robber shot the customer.

He then looked around the bank and noticed one of the tellers looking straight at him.
The robber instantly shot & killed her also.

Everyone in the bank, by now horrified, stared down at the floor in silence.

The robber yelled, "Well, did anyone else see my face?"

There was a long moment of dead silence in which everyone was terrified to speak

Then, one old Floridian named Kyle cautiously raised his hand and said,

"My wife got a pretty good look at you !!!!."