Iceland - waves, elves and white women...really white women

Hey dudes, what's on? Listen I used to take care of all the people I knew. I was the driver for every group of friends I've had since I was 17. I bought the beer.....I paid for trips......the whole nine freakin yards. Now, life isn't so nice to me, but that's ok because adversity builds character. However, I want to go to Iceland and I need one of y'all out there to take me.

Dudes, Icelands has pointbreaks and mean angry waves.....C'mon dudes, pack the rubber and a whole Hobbit-like surf world is ours for the taking. It's got to be empty and you know........ no race, creed or class of people can tame Jersey Boys so hell with any locals. We couldn't understand what they are jabbering aboot anyway.

Dudes, they have elves there. I swear..... Imagine a crisp, cold session at some desolate point break.....with no condo/McMansion backdrops, rather a volcanic-like topography isolated from any WAWA's. After surfing we head out into the Icelandic countryside......cold wind sweeping through our bald spots cleansing out the senses and preparing us for an elfen encounter. Past the tree lines we'll spot the rocky outcroppings home to the Icelandic elves. Since we are spiritual surfer beings they will make their existence known and invite us in to their houses hidden amongst the rocky outcroppings and we will dine on pancakes and coffee with them. They probably will partake in smoking enchantment, and you know those dudes have it, man.

Oh and did I mention white women...really white women......HAHA yeah look at the brothers over there....they know what I'm talking about. OK, I will look forward to any takers. I live pretty simply, I hate posessions and I'm not allowed to drink anymore. I like pizza and crab cakes. Sorry, I will not indulge in any man-love, but I will be more than happy to have a Shred Chick take me to Iceland. Man that would be pretty cool, a shred chick.....I keep forgetting about shred chicks.....we juts don't have many of them in New Jersey.....oh you'll see a few in the summer........but you just don't see them. See all The Italian men in New Jersey forbid their women from surfing....very macho they are.

 

Did you know that your comparison of me to a few famous writers and "the crackhead who lives behind the convience store near (your) house" is the best thing I have ever heard. I would like to know more about this crackhead of yours. That was a good line. That small stretch of rotted concrete, trash containers and feral cats creates a surreal experience for any indigent, but for the "smoke inhaler," it becomes something much more.....oh so much more.....You have given me reason to dream......to believe........I'm totally stoked on that place behind the convience store.....that's near your house. I can not stop thinking about it.

 

No it's not. I saw a whole bunch of people in December.....all of a sudden all these people came out of no where around mid-December......Maybe college kids coming home victorious with knowledge....I don't know. But no, Jersey is not desolate enough these days. Plus dude, I really want to see those Icelandic elves. Thank you for letting your wife surf. I'm sure she appreciates it. Remember though, that you and your sons come first and then her. Make sure you keep her in line. Awww I'm just joking....calm down......Ship Bottom !!! How's 7-11 these days? God almighty do I remember LBI......The best days of my life were comprised of Harvey Cedars and Panzone's Pizza on lonely, cold fall nights. A bit too much North Jersey influence up in LBI, but a real great friggin place nonetheless.

 

Nahhhh I'm completely sober............and heck no, there is nothing wrong with enchantment. I'm ready to get back on the saddle with enchantment myself.........The government won't let me drink, and I don't want to anyway. Booze sucks.......I don't know, maybe some of y' all drink three drinks in two hours and alls good. But I'm Irish and I don't play around. Or I used to not play around. Kids !!!! Everything except smoking enchantment is BAD !!! It's fake, artificial and deadly. Icelandic elves only smoke enchantment. They know better and leave everything else, especially cheap-arse vodka, alone.....Cheap-arse vodka........Cheap-arse vodka........YOU RAPSCALLION !!!

 

Ok we need to get someone to finance it.......Anybody want to make a movie about a couple of Jersey dudes looking for waves, elves and white women? C'mon better premise than most movies out today. Somebody help me and Salt out.......low budget....high profit potential.

 

See Johnny Utah knows what's up. DANG NAM IT will some one send me and Salt to friggin Iceland !!!! One of you dudes with the camera who has big dreams.....I garauntee a cinematic success.........Send us to Iceland......I know these elves exist........I feel them............The Icelandic government recognizes their existence, well, they build roads and such detouring possible elven domiciles.......C'mon, imagine getting invited back to a magical hut nestled amongst the rocky outcroppings of volcanic Iceland..........taking a bong hit, drinking coffee and eating pancakes.You know elves are good cooks. Please help my wish come true. I have humanism disease and I might die in 30 or 40 years. Please help a sick man's dream come true. Oh Johnny Utah you come too......ARGGGGHHHH why are you guys being so mean to me........

 

Heard about this Gruvi fellow when I first came on here two weeks ago. Yes I joined in November but only started getting on the boards a few weeks ago. Though I did read one thread back in fall about Ocean City meany-guys. Some dude who would fight and die for Waverly. That was great stuff.

Anyways, I am deepely disappointed that the readership of SwellInfo aren't the type to be stoked on an Icelandic adventure....yeah you just go to Barbados and be warm and be sissies. Where's the brave, adventurous souls who yearn for desolate point breaks, clean crisp, cold air, volcanic - Lord of the Rings topography, elves who partake in smoking enchanment and serve you pancakes and coffee. WHERE ARE YOU...OH MY GOD WHERE ARE YOU ???