Get drunk, go on internet, talk about how drunk you are on internet to invisible peeps. Wake up next day and realize you need more real friends.
Wait wait wait... Hollll up. I did this? Ever wake up and know you did something wrong? The ol lady won't talk to me and the dog is looking at me funny. I had a uncle that used to drunk call and I hate that fuker. I'm Sorry Doug, I hope you live a long time.