The Lighter Side

Discussion in 'All Discussions' started by nopantsLance, Feb 20, 2017.

Page 35 of 71
  1. Jan 2, 2019 #681
    Yankkee

    Yankkee Well-Known Member

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    Nov 8, 2017
    upload_2019-1-2_22-13-20.png
     
    Yankkee, Jan 2, 2019
    Yankkee, Jan 2, 2019
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  3. Jan 3, 2019 #682
    nopantsLance

    nopantsLance Well-Known Member

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  5. Jan 3, 2019 #683
    nopantsLance

    nopantsLance Well-Known Member

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  6. Jan 3, 2019 #684
    nopantsLance

    nopantsLance Well-Known Member

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  7. Jan 5, 2019 #685
    nopantsLance

    nopantsLance Well-Known Member

    4,745
    Aug 15, 2016
    'the Mexican and the Bicycle.'

    A policeman was working on the border between Mexico and the United States. One day, a Mexican arrived on a bicycle. The man had a large bag on his back, and the policeman was sure that he was smuggling something, so he asked the man to open the bag. (What do you think was inside?)

    Inside the bag there was only sand. The policeman poured all the sand onto the ground but there was nothing else in the bag, so he let the man go.

    For the next three years this happened twice a week. The Mexican arrived on a bicycle carrying a bag of sand. The policeman was more and more sure that the man was smuggling something, but he could never catch him.

    Years later the policeman retired. One night he was drinking in a bar when the Mexican came in. The policeman bought the Mexican a drink. They were sitting and talking together when the policeman said: ‘You can tell me now. I’m retired and it doesn’t matter anymore. I know that you were smuggling for three years. What was it?’

    The Mexican smiled and said...

















    "Bicycles."
     
    nopantsLance, Jan 5, 2019
    nopantsLance, Jan 5, 2019
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  8. Jan 6, 2019 #686
    nopantsLance

    nopantsLance Well-Known Member

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  9. Jan 8, 2019 #687
    DosXX

    DosXX Well-Known Member

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  10. Jan 8, 2019 #688
    DosXX

    DosXX Well-Known Member

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  11. Jan 9, 2019 #689
    CJsurf

    CJsurf Well-Known Member

    1,552
    Apr 28, 2014
    In 1986, Peter Davies was on vacation in Kenya after graduating from Northwestern University.

    On a hike through the bush, he came across a young bull elephant standing with one leg raised in the air. The elephant seemed distressed, so Peter approached it very carefully. He got down on one knee, inspected the elephant's foot, and found a large piece of wood deeply embedded in it. As carefully and as gently as he could, Peter worked the wood out with his knife, after which the elephant gingerly put down its foot.

    The elephant turned to face the man, and stared at him for several tense moments. Peter stood frozen, thinking of nothing else but being trampled. Eventually the elephant trumpeted loudly, turned, and walked away. Peter never forgot that elephant or the events of that day.

    Twenty years later, Peter was walking through the Chicago Zoo with his teenaged son. As they approached the elephant enclosure, one of the creatures turned and walked over to near where Peter and his son Cameron were standing. The large bull elephant stared at Peter, lifted its front foot off the ground, then put it down. The elephant did that several times then trumpeted loudly, all the while staring at the man.

    Remembering the encounter in 1986, Peter could not help wondering if this was the same elephant. He summoned up his courage, climbed over the railing, and made his way into the enclosure. He walked right up to the elephant and stared back in wonder. The elephant trumpeted again, wrapped its trunk around one of Peter legs and slammed him against the railing, killing him instantly.

    Probably wasn't the same elephant.

    This is for everyone who sends those heart-warming bullsh!* stories on social media.
     
    CJsurf, Jan 9, 2019
    CJsurf, Jan 9, 2019
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  12. Jan 9, 2019 #690
    sisurfdogg

    sisurfdogg Well-Known Member

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    Jun 17, 2013
    Bambi Meets Godzilla

     
    sisurfdogg, Jan 9, 2019
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  13. Jan 9, 2019 #691
    nopantsLance

    nopantsLance Well-Known Member

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  14. Jan 9, 2019 #692
    nopantsLance

    nopantsLance Well-Known Member

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  15. Jan 9, 2019 #693
    Yankkee

    Yankkee Well-Known Member

    2,353
    Nov 8, 2017
    Looks like Jeff Bezos WAS the richest man in the world...
     
    Yankkee, Jan 9, 2019
    Yankkee, Jan 9, 2019
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  16. Jan 9, 2019 #694
    DawnPatrol321

    DawnPatrol321 Well-Known Member

    17,845
    Mar 6, 2012
    Now he's "half the man he use to be?"
     
    DawnPatrol321, Jan 9, 2019
    DawnPatrol321, Jan 9, 2019
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  17. Jan 9, 2019 #695
    JayD

    JayD Well-Known Member

    3,021
    Feb 6, 2012
    Wasn’t she the brainchild of Amazon anyway...I think she is a novelist. She gonna get half. That is a lot of cabbage!
     
    JayD, Jan 9, 2019
    JayD, Jan 9, 2019
  18. Jan 9, 2019 #696
    Yankkee

    Yankkee Well-Known Member

    2,353
    Nov 8, 2017
    estimates.....70 billion or more.....plus some of the properties....:eek:
     
    Yankkee, Jan 9, 2019
    Yankkee, Jan 9, 2019
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  19. Jan 9, 2019 #697
    MrBigglesworth

    MrBigglesworth Well-Known Member

    1,390
    Jun 29, 2018
    Friggin CLASSIC
     
    MrBigglesworth, Jan 9, 2019
    MrBigglesworth, Jan 9, 2019
  20. Jan 10, 2019 #698
    nopantsLance

    nopantsLance Well-Known Member

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  21. Jan 10, 2019 #699
    DosXX

    DosXX Well-Known Member

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  22. Jan 11, 2019 #700
    nopantsLance

    nopantsLance Well-Known Member

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    nopantsLance, Jan 11, 2019
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