"Welcome to paradise, now go to hell" by Chas Smith. Painful, man..

Discussion in 'Mid Atlantic' started by Tuono, Dec 19, 2013.

  1. Tuono

    Tuono Well-Known Member

    Sep 13, 2012
    So, I figured I would enjoy something to read, like before bed and such...Once in a great while I'd pick up a book about surfing and though it's rarely anything special at least it tends to be entertaining and kinda nice on a cold, cold day. I kinda liked "Sweetness and Blood", it was mind blowing how surfing culture spread around the globe, even to places that hardly ever even get proper wind slop. The 'coolness' of surfing is a fascinating subject to me. Actually, to be honest, when going someplace to surf I would often tell friends that it's really a fishing trip but I plan to "have fun in the water and surf, too". Using the power of the wave and interacting with it is just awesome but I try to keep it in check for what it is and not have culture (dress code, industry ****, etc) consume me. Surfing was made cool by some cool people.

    So I got that book and it has to be the biggest **** I ever read, on sport/lifestyle subject. Has anyone attempted to read that? And it was reviewed generally positive! First of the guy is a narcissistic douche and it is right about impossible to get over it. Second, he makes all those Da Hui people even bigger caricatures than they built themselves to be. This whole NS fascination is getting old. And I like reading stuff than makes you feel smarter and more insightful, this guy couldn't get over his [email protected]#ing designer clothes. Do yourself a favor and skip that. If you gotta read it, libraries got it.
  2. AndrewIfallalot

    AndrewIfallalot Well-Known Member

    Aug 24, 2012
    Surf literature is not exactly on the list of high art

  3. Paddington Jetty Bear

    Paddington Jetty Bear Well-Known Member

    Apr 23, 2013
    Chas Smith is the greatest human being on the planet. He has fine tastes, and dresses impeccably.
  4. nynj

    nynj Well-Known Member

    Jul 27, 2012
    I'm reading it now and am actually enjoying it... He is definitely the biggest douche ever, but I do enjoy hearing stories about people getting pounded by Hawaiian meth head scumbags...
    If you've ever read anything Chas Smith has written you know he's a douche...

    I do love that he dedicated the book to Mick Fanning after completely trashing him.
  5. funkyspec

    funkyspec Well-Known Member

    Jul 19, 2012
    When I was a navy junior officer stationed at NAS Barbers Point 20 years ago me and 4 other jo's used our fat housing allowance to rent a sweet 5000 sq ft mansion on sunset point. Right next door to Fast Eddie Rothman.

    A few months after moving in, one of my roommates had a squadron officers' party at the house, which ended with a brawl: US Navy vs. Da Hui, eventually broken up by HPD. No one was hurt - some black eyes around Hangar 282 at Barbers, and Eddie told us the next day everything was good between us - he had fun drinking and fighting.
    Last edited: Dec 19, 2013
  6. funkyspec

    funkyspec Well-Known Member

    Jul 19, 2012
    Last edited: Dec 19, 2013
  7. spikeb122

    spikeb122 Well-Known Member

    Jan 13, 2009
    you want good surf reading, try reading "In search of captian zero" pretty cool book, i forget the author though. I also tried reading "the Wave" by susan casey, really enjoyed it because i'm an ocean scientist and it was both ocean science and surfing, but all surfin was laird hamilton centric. Got kinda hard to read... its now sitting on my bedside table for about a year or 2 now
  8. arctail

    arctail Member

    Sep 25, 2013
    I hate mass market surf culture and expected to identify with this book but have to agree it's mostly an irritating waste of time. Chas Smith comes off as a wanna be gonzo without the analytic chops or humor to pull it off. He continually invokes the "cinematic life" to try to give himself depth but it's a dumb and undeveloped concept used as a stand in for actual thoughts. (And going to a war zone for Vice magazine does not make him a war reporter, it makes him an idiot). A couple good chapters on Pipe contests make me think the guy could certainly pull off a good article or two, and like many other books published these days this project would have been better at that length. Just not enough there for a full book.
    The surf reading I most enjoy lately is anything by Matt Warshaw. EOS online is such an awesome project, skip this book and donate there instead.
  9. cackedinri

    cackedinri Well-Known Member

    May 21, 2012
    the north shore stories are entertaining but the fashion references and cinematic life crap are unreadable.

    also love how this dude cracks on bede durbidge, fanning, yadin nicol and every other pro who would blow him out of the water.
  10. Mulletbarrels

    Mulletbarrels Member

    Oct 14, 2013
    Halfway through it now, and it gives great insight into North Shore surf culture. Although when I read about surfing I tend to want to keep it a little more positive. It makes them sound like a bunch of teenagers out there trying to be cooler than the next. Naturally, limited waves + unlimited surfers = Da Hui........The tactics work though, if I'm going to travel for a wave it won't be the North Shore, it will be Indo.
    Last edited: Dec 27, 2013
  11. Mattyb

    Mattyb Well-Known Member

    Apr 2, 2013
    I don't think I've ever met anyone cool named Chas...wait a minute...yeah nope.
  12. Tuono

    Tuono Well-Known Member

    Sep 13, 2012
    Overall, I don't even have that much against those Hui tough guys there...NS is small and surfers greedy and it would be a big mess in no time without any rules. BTW, if you think you'll go to Indo and find desolate bombing breaks with no wave competition, check again.

    I found that book straight unreadable, stories are entertaining if have never been there, he is referring to fashion or which dildo he prefers every other line, it's just too much. It does make you consider how all the pros got on Makua's music bandwagon when he released that, at best mediocre (read:$hi11y) Hawaiian local album. It really isn't in the same league as, say, Pepper...but they had it everywhere. Paying for surfing there, I guess.

    Dude was an editor of a surfing magazine...figures as most are written in middle school gibberish and meant for 16 yo's. But, somehow, their music pics are always for some serious dude in his 30s or 40s. Total contrast to the whole layout. Anyway..
  13. cepriano

    cepriano Well-Known Member

    Apr 20, 2012
    never heard of chad or his books but it seems like most people don't know what or who da hui was.first off there is no more da hui,its only a brand for tshirts and hats now.2nd,da hui were real local Hawaiians,north shore people who had everything stolen from them,then the aussies came and tried to steal the show in the surf,so a bunch of guys got together and started kiken a$$ and patrolin the beaches.nothing wrong with that.i couldn't imagine being a local somewhere and anytime theres a swell u have 500 foreigners battling for waves in your backyard.me personally,id just run people over and get some new fins if im dodging 30 different people as im cruising down a wave.

    before da hui came about all the Hawaiian surfers were really dudes from cali who moved there and they treated everyone with respect,smoked dope and drank beers with them,so no need for a crew to come out yet whoopin behinds
  14. zach619

    zach619 Well-Known Member

    Jan 21, 2009
    Can't really judge them, because i've never met any of them, but I have seen tons of documentary and films and stories with them in it. I really think that they are a joke though. When I was in Hawaii, I spoke to a lot of locals and transplants (bartenders, surfers etc) and they explained to me how the real Polynesians really give them all a hard time. Bar, restaurant and hotel owners and management get a really hard time if they hire gringos from the mainland who are transplants. I heard all about the plight of the people and all. I get that. I respect that.

    But that is way different that the "Da Hui". Those guys are just local clowns, who just can't keep up in surfing anymore. Hawaiian surf culture is just a mix of guys from California (who actually revolutionized surfing those waves) and OZ and some true Hawaiians. I.E. Jamie Obrien. I.E. The irons brothers. I.E. every other wealthy kid from California who has parents that will let them grow up on the North Shore.... Thats life. Thats the world. It happened to California. It happened to Hawaii. Its happening to Indo. Its happening in Bel Mar New Jersey.. That is life... You can't promote the fact that you have all this world class surf and make all this money over all these years off the media and the events and the local economy and not expect a backlash from it.... No where is sacred.

    And to make matters worse, Hawaiians were very close to speaking Japanese and having ALL their islands taken from them. If you think that the Japanese were going to let the Aloha spirit live on there, you are wrong... So, a little respect needs to be given to their friends on the mainland.

    I mean, the video of them pounding some kid in the water because he was out in the lineup during a contest. That is a joke. Ask any cop or lifeguard in California or Hawaii. There are no rules or laws that prevent people from doing that. Yes, its a D-Bag move to interfere with a pipeline contest, but having a pipeline contest and telling people they can't surf there for a week is hypocritical. It goes against the whole point they are trying to make. You can paddle out in the middle of ANY contest in CA. Lower Trestles. Anywhere and there aint SH** anyone can do about it. Its a di** move yes, but thats why we all surf. You can paddle out anywhere in the ocean (minus Holister ranch and a few military bases, and most of Hilton Head for that matter) and surf whenever the fu** you want....

    Da Hui is just mad because they have been outgunned by the guys from OZ and the Guys from the mainland. They travel to HI and put on a better show. Even the most localized spots in CA follow order. Ive never had a problem at any of the most "loc'ed" spots out there... Everyone gets in line and everyone waits their turn.... The fact is, the guys born and raised on the North Shore aren't necessarily the best out there doing it anymore. I mean, a kid from Florida has been owning them for 2 decades.... It is what it is... Surf better. Progress better. Have more Hawaiians in the lineup to take waves from other people..... But that North Shore chip on the shoulder BS is way played out. It would be different if they are all out there killing it. They aren't anymore. I've met tons of angry CA locals *****ing about all the crowds and stuff... Thats life.... And within less than 6 months of me living there, I figured out where to go. Where to avoid the crowds and 9 out of 10 times I would be scoring perfect waves with only a couple other people, because the "tourists" flock to the most notable spots.... The true Hawaiian locals should be down the road, surfing "secret" spots and all that. Instead they are fighting over Pipeline, which they themselves exploited. You can't have your cake and eat it too forever.

    I mean, even the transplants in HI usually have a chip on their shoulder. I got into a barrel photo cell phone battle with a guy there over beers, cause he was showing me little head high point break barrels that he scored and acting like California is Flat. So I am showing him shots of me in some pretty heavy surf in a couple nice barrels, like WTF man, you really think that HI is the only place that has waves, and that just because you guys live here, you automatically surf better than the rest of the world. And this conversation happened after his 10 minute ti-raid about how Laird Hamilton Ruined Hawaii and the World...

    Anyway, Hawaii rant is over with. I have had this conversation too many times.

    And i am sure 100 guys on here would disagree with me, but the state of CA has FAR better surf (overall) than HI as a whole. We get the same swells as they do, but our whole coast line takes EVERY swell angle, while most of the year they have to island hop or drive 3 hours to surf. We have BIGGER big wave spots in CA. We have more consistent surf.... No, CA has no Pipeline, I will give them that. We dont have the north shore, but we got Mavs, We got Ghost Tree, we "technically" have the Cortez Bank. Blacks. Trestles. Rincon. I mean, the list goes on and on....

    HI is beautiful. Perfect weather. Perfect water temps... Its truly paradise, but they are just a representation of old school surf history and culture. They are no longer the innovators they once were. They can only fist fight every gringo for so long before they get over run like everyone else has... Its a shame, but thats life. Other countries half wave across the world have better, more consistent waves that have only been talked about in the last 20 years.... They are no longer the leader in surfing in any way really. Guys are in INDO clocking like 45 seconds of tube time on the SAME WAVE!! I mean, come on....
    Last edited: Dec 27, 2013
  15. krl0919

    krl0919 Well-Known Member

    May 3, 2011
    My mom got it for me as a Christmas gift. Haven't touched it yet but plan on reading it in a few weeks on the plane to California. Hope it doesn't suck as bad as everyone says
  16. Paddington Jetty Bear

    Paddington Jetty Bear Well-Known Member

    Apr 23, 2013
    Zach that was beautiful, man......
  17. AndrewIfallalot

    AndrewIfallalot Well-Known Member

    Aug 24, 2012
    Eddie Rothman helped start Da Hui and he is as far from HI Native as you can get, he's a Philly Jew who came to HI by way of Bellflower, CA! All fake!
  18. cepriano

    cepriano Well-Known Member

    Apr 20, 2012
    wow I never knew that lol,rothman is definitely a jew name,his kids look Hawaiian tho,I guess from being in the sun all day.yea very few real Hawaiians,u can tell who are the real ones by their color and size,most look like Asians and are overweight and don't even surf.idk,I look at guys who rip like Jamie o,johnjohn,the irons when they were around,and none of those guys are real Hawaiians.you know john johns mother is from ocean grove nj,and she ran away as a teen because she hated surfing cold water so she went to hawaii
  19. DawnPatrol321

    DawnPatrol321 Well-Known Member

    Mar 6, 2012
    Solid post Zach, always a pleasure reading your stuff
  20. stinkbug

    stinkbug Well-Known Member

    Dec 21, 2010
    Da Hui is a gang as is the Wolfpak. Has nothing to do with true native Hawaiians, which by the way are few in numbers. The true Hawaiian blood has been watered down by Asian, mostly Japanese and Phillipino) immigrants These guys think just because they were born in Hawaii they are true Hawaiians by blood. And yes Eddie Rothman is a Jew by blood so that makes Makua part Jew as well. Kala is Phillipino I believe. These guys have very little education and a high school mentality on how to approach life still. That being said they will kick the **** out of you with no regard. Chas Smith seems like a real kook (who would rent a white convertible Spyder to drive around the North Shore) and is not that good of a writer honestly but his book tells some pretty crazy stories abou winter on the north Shore. Drugs, extortion, and violence are commonplace.